Tag Archives: Time

My Story My Version: The Ride, the Drive, and in Park.

Oh the ride through life. . . And my fortune cookie (3/16/2023) reads:

🦋🍀💞💖 (This should always be your mindset- overcome the battle win in life, being your best inspiration to others). In the positive way, overcome negative energy, with a smile, walk away and come back, in your positive resolve to win). Positive feels amazing). .🍀💞💖🦋

This is true to my character. As in My Story My Version: The Ride, the Drive, and in Park, this is my viewpoint to the world (Life) we use as our roadmap, (gps if you will.)..

The Ride

The Ride, sit in the passenger seat and as you ride through life, taking in the scenery. We are collecting all the information along the way. It’s peaceful and educational, it’s the beating and the praise that life offers us. For learning, experience, and the knowledge that makes us fail or successful. Sometimes the ride isn’t enough, so we must push for a driver to teach, guide and help us gain insight. It’s a privilege to ride, it’s a honor to ride, but our driver must influence life skills to help us not hurt us. Meaning reach good intentions and steer us from bad habits/tendencies. (You get it!) We gathering tools to make good life decisions, we explore and experience the pain, tears, and bruttle truth. We share love, joy, happiness, and compassion. The experience that guides us in life, emotional, mental, and physical awareness tools. Without these experiences we are limited to our personal growth. Development to be your best self is incomplete. Our developmental growth should never stop unless medically determined. Knowledge is a continual need to live. Just as we need water to live, something’s we can not live without.. I know everyday I’m searching for knowledge (our personal storage of wisdom) 😁 to breath and live life. The Ride is our blessing to be understanding, knowledgeable, and awareness of being good people by nature. Take in the scenery, learn and educate yourself every chance you get. It’s best if practiced daily💞 make it routine, it increases your value to life. 🦋

The Drive

The Drive is the tools applied to our life. What we are doing? Where we are going? How we are doing? And Why we are doing? It’s the purpose of who we are. The tools are used to get us through this roadmap of life. And hopefully the gps takes us to paradise one day. The fact is your belief on your terms. Mine is the Road to paradise to meet my God and praise the glory of his eternal life he has made for me or (us). Our drive is the motivation that determines our abilities to live life to it’s full potential. Be kind, be helpful, be creative, be dedicated, be honest, be hard-working, be the best you can be here on earth. What you didn’t accomplish today, tomorrow will determine your eligibility to continue your ride, drive, and park. It’s not promised, but your legacy is being documented. Your drive is here for others to remember, leave your mark with positive writing, energy, and time. Remember we are crowded here on earth, our legacy can be replaced very quickly. Think about that? Kind of a scary thought, that I did nothing with my time on earth. “Forgotten is invisible to the world” – I believe I matter more than those words. I want to help others see and be the happiness that our God foresee’s. In hopes that happiness is within my soul, shit, pain is the least need or want in my path. If all possible I will detour the road with positive energy embracing the experiences as needed to grow and learn. To enable and produce negative in my life is blocked for construction if all possible. To avoid negative, a road closure will help me fix the problem with understanding and knowledge so the road can reopen with a positive outcome. Don’t you believe you have value to life here on earth? You matter, your time is important. Fix the negative with positive energy. One thing I use as needed, when a negative energy is presented. Example: a negative person, to use kindness is a reflection of my character. If someone feels a certain negative way, that’s their inner character. To embrace positive is not in their ride, the scenery has influenced that ride. I can’t ride with them. But at the moment I can drive the positive to them. If they catch that knowledge with the experience. Then the ride can change the scenery. And hopefully when in park, the influence changed the ride. It’s the ride you choose. I can offer the ride and the park to educate your drive. But I can’t drive that route of negative. Sorry, my road trip has a detour for that ride. Just think about your road trip, it’s your choice to influence the trip. Are you gassing up for a remarkable drive to leave a positive impression..? I know, I’m trying my best 😁🦋

In Park

And finally in Park. . . We are at our thinking and our reflection in our minds and body. Actions, behavior, words, awareness, understanding and mindset We reflect how we are presented. How was your day? Was it a lazy day? That’s okay! In Park is the position in life that reflects our needs, desires, and drive. Thoughts push us in time to drive our purpose. Was it a busy productive day? The physical beating on your body but the feeling of accomplishment? How impressive, great job! No matter what your day presented, your reflection is a stepping stone. A stepping stone that represents you. What your drive determines is what, where, how, and why are life’s drive of understanding, knowledge and purpose. In park is the time to see, feel, and express cultivate your inner drive. You are checking the maintenance of your mind, body, and soul purpose. The- What’s next? What can I do to make my life positive, more for filling to my own being?

What is true happiness? All those questions are answered in Park. Our true being is found, determined, and that is Life’s happiness. Happiness is an awesome feeling. Happiness is healthy. Happiness and Love is the ride, drive and in park – purpose to Life and guide/direction to paradise. Love and let Love!!

As I have share the meaning of human life – purpose. The Ride, Drive and in Park, we can take one promise away from this blog post. A promise of learning, learning to be your best person. First for yourself to be happy- and we all know happiness feels wonderful. Second, is for others, inspire and influence positive energy. If your unsure where to start, I have a blog post for that.. ( will update soon with a link to help improve positive energy). But let me warn you it’s contagious😁 and final… .. 🍀💖

Finally, you don’t have to impress anyone. The trip is yours to enjoy and be blessed. You have to impress your final appraiser. And that judgement day is your will. Your belief and your final destination. Now, with that being said, like I said before, if paradise is my final destination – I’m going to enjoy this road trip with positive energy in hopes to have a big smile on my face when I reach – PARADISE🍀💖🦋

Life is full of the good, bad and ugly. As I know we all had the blessings of love,peace, and happiness- those negative influences have put us through “HELL”! 🍀The battle may be fierce but so is your resolve to win.🍀 My battle has made me stronger, wiser, and aware of who I am. With that being said, I worked to damn hard to go to “Hell” and burn all my valuable work! 💞💖 So I be damned, if I’m giving in to give my hard work, determination, and happiness to the Devil. Not today, Satan👹 – Resolve to win 💕💖🦋

Until our beautiful minds meet again, be safe out there. Much love and many blessings. Remember Everyday Minds Matter -Della 💞🦋

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Testing Patience

Faith and patience are two of the most important traits that we must develop if we want to get through life with dignity. Unfortunately, not everyone is equipped with the same level of resilience, which can make it difficult when it comes to disagreements or moments where our opinion differs from others. When those moments occur, it’s important for us to remain in control of our actions and behavior, no matter how much our feelings want to tell us otherwise.

Have Patience

In such cases, praying can often help guide us towards making the right decisions, allowing God to handle matters as best as possible. It’s important that we do not give in to any rash impulses during these times; instead, take a few moments to breathe and collect yourself so that you may assess the situation in a better way before attempting to find an appropriate solution. Only then will you be able to act out of character without regretting it later on.

When we encounter situations that test our faith and patience, it can be a difficult experience to get through. When two people have different views, disagreements can arise and lead to arguments or hurt feelings. In these cases, it’s important to know how to handle the situation in a positive way that doesn’t cause more harm or emotional pain. The first step is to take some time and think before speaking. When emotions are running high, it can be easy to react without considering the consequences of your words. Pause and reflect on what the other person has said instead of instantly reacting. It may even be helpful to take a break from the conversation altogether if necessary in order to regain composure and ensure you won’t regret your words later.

Once you are able to discuss the situation with a calmer headspace, express your opinion respectfully. Be open minded and try not to talk over one another – take turns when talking about the issue at hand and let each person have their say. Listen actively for what the other person is saying rather than merely hearing them out and already formulating a rebuttal in your head as they speak. Ultimately, this will help foster understanding on both sides as well as build empathy which could ultimately bring you closer together as opposed to driving further apart. Even if you don’t agree with the other person’s opinion or perspective on things, respect their right to have it nonetheless. Showing acceptance even in times of disagreement will go a long way.

Maintaining peace between two people with opposing beliefs or opinions while still allowing both sides the freedom to share their point of view; without feeling judged or attacked by the other party involved. By testing our faith and patience with difficult conversations and tough topics, we have an opportunity for growth – if handled correctly. Rather than looking at such situations as “painful experiences”, view them instead as potential lessons that can bring us closer together as we learn from each other with mutual understanding and compassion rather than simply competing against each other for who can “win” in any given argument or debate.

Conflicting views or relationships can trigger our mental health issues. How we are able to balance conflict is a matter of patience. Even though our patience can be tested, you are in control. You are able to change a defusing situation by your mindset. It can be easy to speak out of character but to resolve the matter with patience, takes practice. High emotions will not help the situation. Emotions will only trigger action or behavior that can escalate the situation. Trying to be calm is a practice that involves breathing technique, that relaxes the mindset. Giving the ability to rethink the message sent by the other person. Once a balance of acceptance is clear the views can point in the right direction.

As we all know, being open minded is important to convey the point of view in a suitable environment. Allowing the mental process to view the empathy behind the intention. Most likely being level headed will defuse the matter to an understanding. Giving the parties opportunity to rationalize through knowledge vs. action. Not every situation can be resolved peacefully. However minimizing the behavior will prevent further conflict. The best scenario is to conquer with kindness. Your resistance to listen or view the perception will determine the end result. Do take a minute to level down and communicate effectively. Take a minute to regroup the mindset so testing patience, will resolve efficiently.

Until our beautiful minds meet again, be safe out there. Many blessings and much. Remember Everyday Minds Matter. -Della 💞🦋

Learn, Life and Love

What have you learned in your life about love?

I believe before one can love, they must understand the value of learning, quality of life, and know what love is.

(1)- (An ability to Learn) Learning is an emotional tag, that allows the brain to understand and process information. One must acknowledge and comprehend hard work. How to: problem solve, have compassion, listen, and value human nature. Educate the mind regularly to face and overcome life challenges.

(2)- (Life skills) To experience life’s challenges and have life skills is part of managing self concepts. Understand the quality of life and those around you. Life skills offer dedication, motivation, and purpose to one’s life. Emotional intelligence, support, psychological and interpersonal abilities.

(3)- (Love) Self-concept to understand yourself and acknowledge what love is. Self respect, value, appreciation, help others, kindness, happiness.

I’ve learned that love requires a lot of work and effort from both parties in order to succeed. It’s important to remember that even though love is hard, it is also one of the most rewarding things in life and worth fighting for. Ultimately, love should be based on mutual understanding, respect, and compassion.

To love unconditionally, a person has to learn by experiencing the nurturing, bonding, trust, compassion, and empathy. Love is an action that’s formed by intimate emotional bonding. Love is not just a feeling; it’s an emotional bond that grows and deepens through shared vulnerability and support. It doesn’t just happen on its own – we have to nurture it and build it over time with intentional actions. When we put effort into creating loving relationships, they can become more intimate, secure, and fulfilling over time. It takes time to love and be committed to love.

Most importantly, love can take years to love unconditionally. And just seconds to destroy. Once love is shattered, no amount of work can restore it. Be careful of your words, your actions, and behavior as it can affect physical, mental and emotional health.

Love is something so powerful and indescribable that we may often mistakenly think of it as a feeling. While feelings certainly play a role, love is ultimately about the intimate bond that two people build together through mutual vulnerability and support. Rather than just expecting to feel love, we must work to build it by taking actions that show how much we care for our partner. We can show our commitment to the relationship in ways such as being supportive, honest, attentive, and kind. Over time, these small gestures will become habitual and create an unbreakable bond between two people that cannot be expressed with words. This bond is what true love really is– an emotional connection that has been formed over time through meaningful actions of kindness and support. Love isn’t something you can expect to happen overnight; rather, it’s something you must nurture with patience and care if you want it to last forever.

Until our beautiful minds meet again, be safe out there. Many blessings and much love. Remember Everyday Minds Matter -Della 💞🦋

🪟 Open to the Public

How we present ourselves to the world

Everyday – is an opportunity

Photo by Anna Tarazevich on Pexels.com

Open to the public, reflects how we present ourselves to the world. Just as no business is open til the lights are on, doors unlocked & first customer comes in.  Its the first welcome of attitude, Just like waking up in the morning. 

Positive gratitude influences what mood starts the day. What will the day become? How many encounters will you have? Will you have new customers or new business opportunities?  Everyday is a new beginning no matter what yesterday offered. Time changes with no regret. Why not build new ideas, give advice or be productive in advance? A simple change in how you present the day, changes the outlook and outcome.

Until the door unlocks and opens, the mind predicts what the future awaits. What mood is the door that let’s the type of energy come through for the day. I give my all to promote a smile everyday. As a conversationist, happiness is always welcome and presented. Don’t be fooled, as I don’t have such good days from time to time. Where I am quiet and conservative, and reserved, like downtime. As I am taking in the world around me. Some days are just a struggle. No matter what that pushing yourself to motivate can’t be tough. It’s up to you to change the day, mood, or challenge. It is the power of your mind that jump starts the moment.

Open to the public is a perception to think outside the box. We are a business regardless of having a business license. We sell ourselves to the world. Everything we do in life is communication, contact, and interaction with others. A good business promoter knows how to interact, influence, and attract opportunities for success. Attitude is of great value in life. As a person if you want 😊 happiness; promote it, it will come in return.

Our minds can pull energy in to help provide our needs and desires. Allowing our mind and body to connect and align is important. Thinking of great ideas is important, but leaving them as thoughts are wasteful. Take the courage to try new opportunities of your own chance. You might be surprised if you created a great opportunity. Nothing is easy, everything worth it, takes time, most of all dedication, and a lot of hard work.

If you want nothing, do nothing, and get nothing. It’s that simple. If life has no purpose then nothing will seem important. Those are thoughts that need encouragement and new thinking to create positivity in the day. A new way of life to feel productive, worthy, and inspired. So when your day is satisfying, it does give comfort in how well you sleep.

At the end of the day, what you put into your day is what matters. That will also determine how welll you sleep. If your day is very fulfilling with physical activity- sleep should fall in routine. If your mind is overworked your physical and mental alignment may suffer. Leaving nights of toss and turning to sleep. Finding that right pattern and balance may take time. In the long run taking time to find that balance is important to your health. Sleep plays a huge role in our everyday lives. Being able to concentrate, focus, solve problems, intellect functions, and being present. When we are open to the public we should be ready. Ready to inspire the world as who we are.

Being you in your own way is important. Your presentation is what people value. If a poor presentation is visible then that quality is left to your viewers. Not everyday will be perfect or as good, but your smile and contact can be noticed. The timing of your presentation can take place anytime of day. It’s important to be ready.

Ready to help, support, influence, and be valuable. If we are to love, to receive love, we must promote it. If you watch and listen that will reflect back with love. The energy of positivity feels amazing. The feet have a nice comfort as you continue the day. Your posture is aligned with the inner feeling of positive energy. You are now open to the public with a reliable presentation. This presentation you created is because of your time, dedication, and hard work.

Are you open to the public? Are you under construction, fixing the presentation for public viewing? You are the future no matter if you’re 12, 31, 54, or 80 years old, your presentation is forever. Be the blessing to someone else. Be contagious, with a positive energy, that everyone wants to experience. I know life can throw rocks, but if we smile and love life. Those rocks can soften to a lighter hit. It’s just a cycle of energy that we create and put out. What’s returned is the energy left behind. Influence, promote, and inspire positivity and the attractive energy is an everyday blessing. 🦋

Until our beautiful minds meet again, be safe out there. Many blessings and much love. Remember Everyday Minds Matter -Della 💞🦋

Letting Go

A Guide to Accepting the Loss of a Loved One

Letting Go
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Losing somebody you love is difficult and can be difficult to cope with. It can be hard to know how to go on, or even what to say to someone who is grieving. You may feel stuck in a rut, or that you are doing everything wrong. Losing a loved one is a natural part of life, but it doesn’t have to be the end of the world. In this post, I will discuss some of the most important aspects of losing a loved one so that you can proceed with your life. You may feel many different emotions, pain, and shed lots of tears. It’s normal to grieve and heal from a loss of a loved one.

1. What do you need to know about grief?

It is hard to accept the loss of a loved one, especially when you are still grieving. It is important to remember that you are not alone in your grief. There are many other people who are grieving the same loss as you. It is also important to remember that grief is a process and that time heals all wounds. It is essential to have someone to help you through the process. You can find a grief counselor to help you through the grieving process. There are also many books that can help you with the grieving process. There are also many other ways to help yourself through the grieving process. You will only know what feels right and what feels uncomfortable. Do not make quick decisions too soon. Your loved ones belongings are in no rush to be bothered with. Making drastic choices or decisions; should be on hold. To get rid of the belongs or let others make decisions for you can be a heavy mistake later. If you feel uncomfortable assistance is available to help with your grievance process. It takes time to heal the loss of loved ones. Some individuals take months and years to begin to feel acceptable to the loss. It’s okay to take your time to process the grief, cry and to feel multiple emotions. You can not rush grievance, only time heals the loss.

Sometimes how we grieve can and will differ from others. If you’re feeling the need to hear your loved ones voice – listen to a saved voicemail, a video from an event. It’s okay to feel these emotions. Missing a loved one can and will create new feelings. These feelings you may have never experienced before. Grief is painful as hell and does not go away over night. Over time we ” get used to the absence”. But it doesn’t necessarily heal the heart. Keeping the memories, pictures, and remembrance close, can give a peace of mind to your life without them. In some cases, some individuals would rather let go. To some letting go -not talk about, see pictures, or live the memories as they are painful. Everyone is different what one person does may not work for you. It’s clearly normal and perfectly okay. In the process, if you feel more out of character reach out for help. If you have children, siblings, or close relatives in the household, keep in mind they are grieving as well.

2. What can you do to help someone who is grieving?

When someone you love dies, it is natural to feel a sense of loss and sadness. This is the time to hold on to the memories and focus on the new memories that will be made in the future. It is important to talk about the loss and the grief with others, as this can often help. Following are some ways you can help someone who is grieving: – Show up to support the person and be there for them – Offer your time and energy – Offer your space – Offer your support – Offer your love – Offer your comfort – Offer your caring. Most of all listen to their needs and choices. They may struggle to make arrangements or ask for help, give your best self, as a friend, supporter, and assistant. They will thank you in time, don’t make a person who’s grieving feel belittled by not saying “thank you” at every moment. Remember that most people grieving are unable to think clearly or focus at situations. Task can be overwhelming, ask if your help is needed with household task or errands. Yet let one have space as well. Some individuals would rather be alone, and that’s okay as well. Our emotions and behavior can be affected drastically. If you feel someone is out of mind or character, try to help them. Grief can cause dangerous behavior or even turning to substance abuse or alcohol. Be cautious of self destruction, not eating, drugs, alcohol or uncommon behavior. Don’t expect big or quick decisions for your grieving loved one. Let them share how they feel and what is needed to handle situations, as they arise. Never demand a grieving person into uncomfortable situations. In time those unsettling, decisions can be more damaging to their well-being. Be kind, respectful, and don’t take their unmindful words to heart. Grief can cause one to lash out and be unpleasant. Yet not meaning it, personally it’s grief emotions that can be harsh. If the lash out or extreme disrespectful words are consistent then other support may be needed. Trying to please a grieving person can be challenging. It can be best for all to walk away if need be. It’s okay, grieving can be difficult to cope with.

3. What should you do to support someone who is grieving?

When someone you care about is grieving, you want to be there for them. It is difficult to watch someone you care about struggle with the loss of a loved one. It is important to put your own feelings aside and support the person grieving. There are a lot of things you can do to help someone grieving. Some of these things include: – Being there for the person – Listening to the person – Helping the person find resources – Helping the person to find solace – Helping the person find a way to feel good again – Helping the person find a way to heal. – Let the person grieve as what works for them – Offer to bring food or join them for dinner. Sadly during grievance we fail to eat. It’s important to look for unhealthy habit as well. Over eating, alcohol abuse, or even drugs should be avoided. The pain is real and we all want to hide from pain. It hurts like hell but the grieving process will get better in time. We can only do so much for one who is grieving. Remember you are trying to help. Don’t take charge of situations without entitlement. More conflict can occur and situations can be hard to settle. Ask questions to help your loved one understand what is needed from them. Let them address their concerns as they may have a good reason to feel a certain way.. The loss can be devastating for many and in some cases some never get over a loss.

There are various ways to cope with the loss of a loved one. This post also suggests that there is no right or wrong way to grieve, and it is important to find a way that works for you. Time heals the loss of a loved one. Don’t feel rushed because there is no time limit. Just know that it may take months or years to heal. In time you can feel normal again, if you feel you can’t manage to cope, speak to a medical advisor. Assistance is there at all times or hours of the day. Take care of yourself, the struggle can impact your well being.

Overall it’s important to understand the grieving process. Grieving is mourning the loss of your loved one, crying, sharing, memories, celebrating the life of your loved one. Releasing the emotional ups and downs of pain and love is healing. Time will get us through, it’s up to us to understand… Nothing about grief can be rushed, healing can only be done with time. Take your time and take care of yourself.

Until our beautiful minds meet again, be safe out there. Many blessings and much love. Remember Everyday Minds Matter-Della 💞🦋

——————————

The Art of Gathering

Times and Gathering

Oh, how the times of gatherings have lost the shine. Interactions and communication are fundamental values to our well-being. The laughter, tears, sorrows, and happiness that others give us in this lifetime. Simple moments that fill our lives with a sense of purpose. Those moments that take place when we gather. During holidays, birthdays, important milestones in our lives. Why gatherings are important and why gatherings help maintain mental health. If you’re wondering where people are gathered today – well the importance of the “Art of Gatherings” is for you.

* Gatherings I can remember as a child family gatherings included large groups of people. Family that included long friends of the family and many more. Gatherings of lots of drinking, grilling out, kids running in the yard, playing horseshoes, volleyball, badminton, belly hurting laughter, and just good times. Those memories create my foundation to my own character. We learn from our childhood how we treat and respect others. The Art of Gatherings are important elements that give opportunity for memories. As a child I had uncles, aunts, grandparents, cousins, nephews, nieces that I grew up with. Those are family members that help shape who I am and have become.

* Time Changes with Age Time changes those gatherings overtime. The gatherings get smaller as loved ones age and leave this earth. We don’t notice until those gatherings are memories of those that once attended aren’t there. An empty chair at the dinner table. Those faces are with their children and grandchildren. Or maybe they have passed on. Our group has branched off to subdivide into other group gatherings. It’s not personal or your fault, life is what happened. Do they get busy with life and fail to attend gatherings? Or do they have larger functions and gatherings elsewhere? Do people still gather? Has the loss of loved ones put a toll on your Art of Gatherings?

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* Picture of Who? The old black and dark colored photos in old albums your parents or grandparents kept. Albums that pictures are falling out of. Old albums that have such high value. One thing we can’t ever replace -photos. If found please keep and protect. Who has photo albums in 2022? Who has a physical camera that takes photos? Has gatherings changed the way we create photo albums? Photo albums are antique, physical pictures are precious diamonds. Who looks at old faded books or albums of photos, these days? Honestly, I do. Those photos are one of two things that live on after we expire. Photos are forever if properly stored and valued. (The other thing that continues after we expire is your signature).

Photo albums for 2022 are cell phones. Everyone has one and those photos should be available to show off daily. But do you glance at those photos after they are saved to your phone? Friends those phones will not hold the value to a photo album. Most of us can say, dang I had 1200 photos on my old phone. Impressive, right? Then the phone broke and those photos are gone. There is no replacement for those moments. That image is stored in memory of our mind. Sadly, we can describe a perfect moment, but our minds can’t print that picture in time.

The Art of Gatherings have a purpose for memories and photos. Take time to use a camera and create a family photo album. An album you created today, is worth a million words to those who inherit the photo album. Do yourself a favor if anything else. Take time to teach your children, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, neighboring children – The Art of Gatherings. Educate our future generation the value of appreciation of gatherings memories, and photo albums. The creation of a scrapbook or a family photo album teaches the value and appreciation to life. Mentally, emotionally, and physically form an attachment to memories and gatherings. The lost art of love can be reborn. Love is created by us who spread the word. Don’t continue to let technology form our future children’s beliefs. Gatherings is in person with photos to place in a photo album. Not the space and time spent on the web/internet that fills illusions of life.

In the final thoughts, The Art of Gatherings, help us deal with challenges. Challenges offer the opportunity to be “live in person”. Where feelings are felt, the good, bad, ugly raw emotions that create us. Feelings that teach us sadness, respect, happiness, love, anger, pain, and the value of an Art of Gatherings. Today is an opportunity to teach a lost value, that can live on longer after you expire. Are you teaching today? Tomorrow? Or sometime soon? I know you have amazing teaching skills. You lived life in the Art of Gatherings. You are a piece of Art that is forever through photos and your signature. Share your teaching skills, everyone’s teachable.

Until our beautiful minds meet again, be safe out there. Many blessings and much love. Remember Everyday Minds Matter -Della 💞🦋

Children’s needs depend on you – Be Responsive

Your Children Need You
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Everyday we all know, our list of things to do, continue to grow. As your children grow they look at you, full attention is on you. How you respond, attend, and show up is a priority to developmental growth. All eyes on you is a fact to life. Children want to grow and develop to be strong adults in life. It’s important how the parent relays facts to life. Be present, show up, and listen. Children crave you, your attention, your affection, and your time.

It’s important to be responsive

It is important to be responsive to your child’s needs. This means meeting their needs promptly and consistently. When you respond quickly and appropriately to your child’s needs, they learn that they can rely on you. Trust and honesty are what a child needs to feel safe and secure. This teaches children to be honest and good adults in life.

The importance of consistency

It is important to be consistent in your parenting. This means establishing routines and sticking to them. Children feel secure when they know what to expect from their parents. Consistency allows children to feel connected to their parents. A child can grow and develop emotions and mental health in a positive direction. Children need consistency to promote healthy mental health.

Hold and cuddle your child often

One of the best ways to create a secure attachment with your child is to hold and cuddle them often. This physical affection helps your child feel loved and secure, and can go a long way in establishing a strong bond between you and your child. Try to make a point of cuddling with your child every day, even if it’s just for a few minutes at bedtime or during morning snuggles. Like the ole’ saying goes, “Hugs go along way, even when they aren’t near”.

Respond promptly to your child’s needs

Another important tip for creating a secure attachment is to respond promptly to your child’s needs. This doesn’t mean you need to drop everything every time your child cries or call off work whenever they’re sick – but it does mean being attentive and responsive when they really need you. If possible, try to have at least one parent or caregiver available who can respond quickly to any major needs or issues that arise. Being attentive helps your child develop positive emotional connections. Connecting with others is an excellent ability to establish.

Establish routines and stick to them

Finally, another helpful tip for creating a secure attachment is to establish routines and stick to them as much as possible. Having consistent routines gives children a sense of security and predictability, which can help reduce anxiety and promote feelings of safety and well-being. Try to maintain regular mealtimes, bedtimes, bath times, etc., as much as possible, and let your child know what to expect ahead of time so they can feel prepared and comfortable. Routine can help a child feel responsible and safe. It’s okay to give your child a schedule to adhere to.

A secure attachment between parent and child is vital for the healthy development of the child. Attachment provides children with a sense of safety and security, which is essential for their emotional well-being. There are many ways to create a secure attachment with your child, but some of the most important include bonding, responsiveness, and consistency. By following these tips, you can give your child the foundation they need to thrive.

Until our beautiful minds meet again, be safe out there. Many blessings and much love. Remember Everyday Minds Matter -Della 💞🦋

In Love With Someone: When Life Is Perfect, Why Does That Love Turn To Hate Over Time?

Change in Love

We’ve all been there: you finally find the one, the person who you know will make you happy for the rest of your life and create beautiful babies with, and you once can’t imagine life without them. But before too long, this love turns to hate, and that person that you once loved so much now seems like an enemy who wants to make your life as difficult as possible. What happened? How did such pure love turn into pure hate? A lot of it comes down to two factors: expectations, and external circumstances. Let’s understand each of these factors in turn.

The Infatuation Stage
When you first start dating someone new, it’s like you’re in love. You can’t get enough of each other and you want to spend every waking moment together. You have this intense need for the person that never goes away. It feels so good to be with them and when you’re not with them, you can’t stop thinking about them. All your time is spent imagining what they might be doing and why they haven’t replied to your last text. They consume your thoughts and nothing else seems important or even interesting anymore. But then, as you spend more time together, something starts to change. Gradually you find yourself wondering if maybe this was all just a temporary feeling – an infatuation stage – and not true love after all. There are times where they seem almost too perfect, so much so that it becomes hard to see any flaws. And you find yourself questioning everything – the relationship, your compatibility and whether or not they’re right for you.

The Dealing with Imperfections Stage
It’s not uncommon for a couple to enter the Dealing with Imperfections stage. This is when you realize that life isn’t perfect and that you are no longer in love with your partner. You see their flaws and it can be difficult to overlook them. It’s important to understand that this is a natural stage in the relationship and it does not mean there is anything wrong with you or your partner. All relationships have highs and lows and this is just one of those low moments. The best way to get through this phase is by being patient, open-minded, and working on improving yourself before expecting too much from your partner. The time will pass and things will return to normal.

It might take some time but patience is key to making things better. Remembering what you loved about each other and what made you happy in the past is also a good idea. If all else fails, don’t hesitate to seek professional help! It may seem scary at first, but it could end up saving your marriage. Marriage counseling is an excellent way to address these problems as well as many others like communication problems or intimacy issues. No matter how dark things seem now, remember that these difficulties won’t last forever if you work together.

The Resentment Stage
Stage one of the love-hate relationship is often called the resentment stage. In this stage, the couple’s love has morphed into something else. It’s not as intense or passionate. The romance is gone. But there’s still a sense of attachment to each other and most importantly a sense of ownership in the relationship. That one partner you will never let go of or give up on. This can be felt by both partners in varying degrees. Some couples are able to bounce back from it and get back into an even greater feeling. But others can’t seem to shake the feeling off no matter what they do.
For some people, it’s easier said than done because their hurt is so deep that they lash out at their partner. With anger and bitterness which only makes things worse between them. And yet others just don’t feel like they’re enough for their significant other any longer.
And when these feelings boil to the surface all at once, it doesn’t take much for a fight to break out and for one person to say something unforgivable that sends everything crashing down around him/her. When someone feels pushed too far, he/she snaps. And the one who was pushed over the edge finally explodes–lashing out in anger, unleashing his/her wrath–in hopes that it would make everything better. However, most often times nothing changes and instead becomes even more toxic. There are arguments about how money should be spent or how plans were made without input from the other party. Whatever reason for fighting about things, issues just continue to grow until eventually one partner either gives up on the relationship entirely (walking away) or reconciles and tries again to work things out (only to have another argument).
What many people forget is that relationships are hard work.

The Break-Up Stage
It’s a cycle that so many of us have been through. You’re in love with someone. You’re happy and life is perfect. And then it all falls apart. Without warning and without reason, you just wake up one day and find yourself hating the person you once loved so much. The reasons for these break-ups vary from person to person – it could be due to betrayal or just losing interest over time – but there are some commonalities that we can identify here. First, after being together for a long time, we start to take each other for granted. We stop appreciating what we have and only focus on what’s wrong instead. Second, resentment starts building up between both people until finally it breaks out into anger or fighting.
Third, we start comparing ourselves to other people because we don’t think our relationship is enough anymore or because things get really tough during hard times like when one partner loses their job or gets sick. Lastly, at this stage, we often want different things than our partner. One of them may want children while the other doesn’t want kids at all; one may want marriage while the other isn’t sure about commitment; one might feel that they need space but the other wants to stay together no matter what. These differences can create problems even if one of the partners agrees to compromise. All these factors play a role in why relationships fall apart and why we end up hurting the ones we love.

Communication and commitment are important factors to help relationships. The challenges take a lot of work. In return it takes both parties to overcome the challenges. If you fail to put in the work, naturally it crumbles in time. It’s not easy to leave, but it’s a wonderful feeling to be happy once again.

Until our beautiful minds meet again, be safe out there. Many blessings and much love. Remember Everyday Minds Matter -Della 💞💞

“I Live Here, Too” : How to Survive a Toxic Relationship

Toxic, too much – Living Together

It’s no secret, and truth is out there. That living in an abusive relationship can be harmful to your physical and mental health, as well as your self-esteem, but it’s not always so easy to figure out how to get out of one. It takes time for days, months, and even years to leave a toxic relationship. Sadly, some never leave the relationship, and the abuser takes the life of the victim.

Recognize the signs of a toxic relationship
Unfortunately, we don’t always know when we’re in a toxic relationship. There are signs that can help you identify the toxicity and get out of it before it hurts your life any more than it already has.
-The person always criticizes you and never agrees with what you say or do. -They make you feel like everything is your fault. -You’re always walking on eggshells around them and they don’t seem to care how they make you feel. -No matter what you do for them, it’s never good enough. You just end up feeling frustrated and powerless.
-Nothing is ever their fault; it’s always yours.
-It feels like no matter what happens, this person will have an excuse for why things went wrong. They’ll find ways to blame you for anything and everything that goes wrong in their lives too. -Nothing is ever their fault; it’s always yours.
-Be honest with yourself about whether these behaviors happen only sometimes, frequently or all the time. If these behaviors happen all the time, then there’s a high chance your partner is not being respectful of you.

Set boundaries with your partner
In order to survive in a toxic relationship, you have to set boundaries with your partner. For example, don’t answer the phone when they call or text you. If they come over, tell them it’s not safe for you right now and that you’ll talk later. The next time they come over, say no and ask them to leave your house. You can also try changing your cell number if necessary. When they make contact again, do not speak to them. Write down everything they do and document it so you will know what repeated behaviors to look out for in the future. Seek help from friends and family who support you. Find an outlet (such as writing) to release any pent-up emotions from dealing with this situation. Keep yourself busy to avoid having too much idle time on your hands. Talk to people close to you about how they feel about what is happening because it helps and gives them peace of mind knowing they are there for you.

Create a support system
The only way you can survive an abusive relationship is by building up your support system. You need family, friends and even strangers that will be there for you no matter what. This will help you feel less isolated and like you’re not the only one going through this. If they know how bad it’s gotten, they might also be able to offer ideas on how to deal with it or ways you can get out. If these people don’t want to take on the burden of being involved in your life all the time, find some who do! Just because he doesn’t want to fix his problems doesn’t mean you have to stay at home crying and waiting for him. Spend time with friends, join groups, go online- anything that gets you out of the house.

Seek professional help
If you are in an abusive or toxic relationship, it is time to get help. You deserve happiness and shouldn’t have to stay in a relationship with that kind of environment. We encourage you reach out for the help you need. There is always someone there for you if you need them; whether it be family, friends, or professionals who can help with your situation. Remember, life isn’t meant to be miserable. Make sure that if you decide to leave a relationship like this, do so safely and don’t take anything from the other person that may jeopardize your safety – including social media passwords. The first few days after leaving will feel like the end of the world, but know that they will pass and things will start to seem better. Find new hobbies that make you happy, as well as meet new people who will support your decisions (even if they’re not perfect).
You deserve happiness and don’t have to stay in a relationship where you’re constantly unhappy because this is how it’s supposed to be. Life isn’t meant to be miserable! Know that you deserve happiness and shouldn’t be staying in a relationship where you’re constantly unhappy because this is how it’s supposed to be. one day soon you’ll realize all of this has been worth it.

Know when to walk away
There are many reasons why you may need to end your relationship. Are you being mistreated? Has your significant other been unfaithful? Does he/she refuse to do anything with you? The list goes on and on. It can be hard to make the decision, but know that there is life after the breakup. The first step is acknowledging the problems in your relationship, then deciding if it’s worth trying for change or if it’s time for him/her to go. To reach this conclusion, ask yourself these questions:
-Does your partner get jealous easily and try to control what you wear, who you talk to, etc.?
, stay in the relationship. If they’re not respecting your boundaries, they don’t deserve you. If they’re not respecting your boundaries, they don’t deserve you. If their not respecting your boundaries,they don’t deserve you. I live here too. When love goes bad, sourness fills the room daily. Pain of cheating, abuse, and demands. But I live here too, it is my favorite word. No love, just anger, and tears. Not married or married, or together for too long. It’s hard but it passes in time. You are a priority, you matter most. Sometimes overtime, we wake up and know it’s time to go. May tomorrow be your day, so happiness fills your soul once again. You deserve love, peace, and happiness. 💕

Until our beautiful minds meet again, be safe out there. Many blessings and much love. Remember Everyday Minds Matter -Della 💞🦋

I’m Right, Here! The Highs and Lows of Being Needed All the Time

Being Needed…

It’s been called needy, codependent and other names, but when it’s someone close to you and you love them dearly, nothing else seems to matter. You want to take care of them and make them happy; you want to be there whenever they need you and anticipate their needs as if they were your own.

  • * Feeling like you’re always needed
    I often feel like I’m needed all the time, which is great because it’s an ego boost. However, sometimes it gets to be too much. I find myself constantly checking my phone or thinking about who needs me next. I have to remind myself that I need me too, and take some time for myself. Sometimes when I do this, I notice how it affects other people in a positive way. They are more productive and happier when they’re not worried about me being there for them at any moment. Being needed has its upsides, but also has its downsides. For example, as soon as you stop needing someone else, they start feeling neglected. It can be hard to balance the highs and lows of wanting to help others while still caring for yourself.
  • *Having to be in control all the time
    The neediness can be overwhelming at times, but it has its perks. You know you have people who rely on you. It’s empowering to be needed. But some days, I just feel like I’m a puppet being pulled around by my strings, with no say in what goes on in my life or theirs. I don’t want to be co-dependent or codependent, but it seems inevitable when you’re involved with someone who needs you all the time. When they ask for your opinion and validation, even if they already know what you’re going to say because they already asked before, it makes me feel so important. ( A thought that doesn’t cross my mind) And then there are the moments where everything comes crashing down and they make me feel powerless. Moments where they demand things from me, not knowing how much I’m struggling myself. Moments where you try to be strong and put on that happy face, but inside you’re dying. It leaves me wondering if this is worth it? Those are just overwhelming emotions that come with being needed. In time, those trying moments do pass.

*Dealing with the emotional ups and downs
There are many challenges that come with being needed all the time. It can be very rewarding, but you also have to find your balance. You always need to make time for yourself, or else it can get overwhelming. There will be days when you feel like everything is going well, and then there are days where you are at rock bottom with no one to talk to about what’s going on in your head. On those days, finding someone who understands how you feel is crucial.
It is important to remember that not everyone experiences this feeling on a daily basis; some people do not even experience this feeling at all!
There are ways of self-care that may seem silly, but they really work. These things may include journaling , deep breathing, or listening to music. I’ve found that during times when I’m feeling so anxious I don’t know what to do with myself, writing down my thoughts gives me clarity and helps me put things into perspective again. You need to take care of yourself before you are able to take care of others – and even if it means saying “no” from time to time! I know that word “no’ is far fetched from my vocabulary. It’s okay to say ‘no” to feel your own inner needs at times. One”no” I can’t today, will give you a feeling of clarity. Clarity of peace of mind and a moment of fresh breathe. It’s okay because it generally works out. Everything is okay, saying yes or no. It’s just fine, and everyone is okay, 😁

  • *The physical toll it takes
    Neediness is draining. It’s one thing to have an emotional attachment to someone else, but it’s another when you’re expected to be at their beck and call. You start feeling more like a servant than a significant other. And you’re not even sure if it’s just this person or all people in general, which doesn’t make things any better for your self-esteem. If anything, they are doing you a favor by accepting your company at all – so they must want to see you too? Sometimes it feels as though there is no real meaning behind anything. There is no love or emotion involved in what should be relationships. When I am needed, I feel desired. I love how much he needs me when he wakes up in the morning before going to work. He can barely get out of bed without holding onto my arm first and having me with him while he drinks his coffee. When I’m not needed anymore, I need to be able to give myself permission to say no. My friends keep telling me that these feelings will pass, that it’s not worth getting caught up in something that won’t last. But how do you know until it ends? How do you know if something is worth giving up your life for now because tomorrow may never come?

*The mental challenges
I’ve found that being needed all the time can have its highs as well as its lows. One day, you may be feeling like you are the most important person to someone else, but then another day they’ll ignore your text message or call. You start to question what they’re doing with their life, and why they don’t want you around. It’s hard not to take it personally, especially when you’re putting in so much effort. It becomes difficult to maintain composure when things seem like they are going downhill. One minute, you’re at the top of your game – making a difference in this world and impacting people’s lives. And then the next moment, you feel powerless again because something goes wrong and there is nothing left for you to do. You feel useless because there was no way for you to control it or prevent it from happening

  • *Life happens Sometimes we meet up with challenges that are beyond our control. Life takes turns for the worst sometimes, and we can only hope for better days ahead. When we face these challenges head on instead of letting them overcome us, we gain more than just relief from stress.. We gain wisdom and strength in knowing how to handle similar situations in the future!. These challenges push us out of our comfort zones, which can be both mentally and physically exhausting. But overcoming these obstacles leaves you feeling powerful! Not many other things in life leave you feeling this strong after getting through it!

Feeling needed is great at times. The neediness catches up to our well-being, unexpectedly. Leaving us feeling that another person may inhibit doing for themselves when able. Taking advantage of your time and your own personal space. If you feel overwhelmed, it’s okay. The feelings will pass when you regain your space and time. Being needed is a rewarding feeling. Those feelings can be overwhelming when challenges occur. It’s okay to set boundaries and maintain your own need of physical and mental health.

Until our beautiful minds meet again, be safe out there. Many blessings and much love. Remember Everyday Minds Matter -Della 💞🦋