Tag Archives: relationships

5 a.m. – The Story of the Abusive Relationship

My Story My Madness

Physical pain vs. emotional or mental pain – it’s abuse
Photo by Alex Green on Pexels.com

At 5 am, many of us might be peacefully sleeping in our beds, unaware of the struggles and fears of those living in an abusive relationship. This story will explore of one such individual who felt such a painful deviation. Anxiety began filling the vessels of every nerve throughout her body. Tears surfaced from deep clenched pain that had no mercy. Once the whiskey evil words of hatred and violence were near – chilling pain and tension surfaced, Rooted fear without camouflage. Knowing those words would turn into punches – Coming from the person who was supposed to love and protect her. Read more about power of fear and the courage it takes to break free and survive.

Meeting the abuser
The first time I ever encountered my abuser was an unforgettable experience. It was a cold December day, we both worked for the same company. I had just finished up my work for the day. I turned around to find a dark handsome stranger smiling at me.
He introduced himself and told me he had been watching me for a while and wanted to get to know me better. I was charmed by his good looks and charisma, so I agreed to meet him after work the following day.
Little did I know, this seemingly charming man would soon turn into my worst nightmare.
When we met the next day, he seemed kind and caring. He was attentive, nice, and funny.. In no time the weekends were spent together, out of town visits, and my heart held a special place for him. Somewhere in a hidden spot in my stomach, I felt unsure, love played the tune. When the song was in tune, it had a beat that was great. On occasion the tune was unsettling from time to time.

Time played its course with all the sweet, kind gestures he offered. My heart wasn’t new to love but he just knew those walks in the park were heartfelt.

– As we soon decided to move in together after 3 years of living apart. In my heart, I didn’t feel the “want to” but my heart cared too much to say “no”. I had known of a woman he dealt with, the details were only told by her. Our conversations were meaningful, yet my heart wore special glasses. Not knowing the truth or getting his story I didn’t question him further. The ups and downs were because of cheating and lying that began to cultivate from his past. Needless to say, in a sick way I seen the reality soon after we meet. It seemed like I wore special glasses that blocked so much, I couldn’t see the truth. However my mind was right on point with whatever was taking place. A guard seemingly was around my heart. It had no hurt or tears as the days continued to pass.

Life seemed good and our needs were filled, the bills paid, and our want for nothing was balanced. Simple life seemed to be good for the most part.

Nice cars, nice home, friends, family nothing was off or questionable. One day after work, outside talking with my neighbor, greeting him after his work day – a not so pleasant eye. Immediately, he stated “I am in the house”. I laughed it off and continued conversation with my neighbor. After awhile, I went into the house, a very hard hit, blow to the face. My heart shattered like a perfect glass to unrepairable pieces of a broken heart. Lost for words, numb, confused, hurt was far from the impact left. That burning feeling on my face had no reality to what happens inside my soul.

The days when love gave your soul the jitters, a beautiful wave that same call “love”. The smile that covers your face and the giggle and laughter that explodes to be released, a silly thing “some call love”. The moment you kiss and your body wants more, a spontaneous gift some call “love”. Days and nights had the beautiful waves of what “some call love”. That what some call “love”, takes time to build and create. One blow to the face – destroyed that what some call love – just two seconds. Those two seconds “can not”, I repeat “can not” give back that jittery wave of what some call love feeling – again. That blow to the face stung for a moment, confusing every word, thought, or intention for awhile. Nothing was the same, the wounds were deep and the patches were cheap. You can’t repair a cheap thought, action, or words, when trust has a high value. Every word was processed differently, analyzing every moment, every step. The hit didn’t hurt, what hurt was I didn’t understand. Everything about me, I fine combed in 3 days. Soul searching to why? The wound was gapped to deep to stitch. Everything changed that day and many days to come, a zombie that died and crawled through life. A mind that heard no beauty to life, nothing made sense at all. We were not okay in my eyes, he seemed I had a problem. And 4 years in – time, time, time. That played in my mind over and over.

However, it soon became apparent that this man had an evil side. As he became more comfortable with me, his true colors started to show. He would become angry and controlling whenever I disagreed with him or didn’t do what he wanted.
At first, the abuse was verbal. He would call me names and belittle me. But it soon escalated into the physical abuse. He would grab me by the arm, hit me or push me against the wall. The fear of not knowing what he would do next left me feeling helpless and trapped in an abusive relationship.
I eventually mustered up the courage to leave him, but I always went back. Learning to adjust is difficult, trying to grasp the emotions and mental pain. The physical abuse is painful at the moment. However the emotional and mental turmoil is permanent. But the emotional scars remain and the memory still haunts me. No one deserves to be treated like that, especially not from their significant other. Sometimes you have to give yourself permission to let go of those who hurt you. One thing is for sure though: I will never let anyone take control of me again. I am living proof that there is life after abuse and pain.

The early signs of abuse
We’ve all heard the stories about abusive relationships, but for many of us, it’s hard to spot the early signs. It’s easy to think that these types of relationships only happen in movies or to people we don’t know, but in reality, it can happen to anyone.
In the story above, the early signs of an abusive relationship were present. The first sign was the fear created by the whiskey-fueled words. These words are often used to manipulate and control a partner, which can lead to a cycle of fear and hurt in the relationship.
The second sign was the hand reaching out to grab the arm. This type of physical aggression is a clear warning sign of an abusive relationship. It can be a sign of dominance, control, and intimidation.
It’s important to remember that abuse doesn’t always begin this way. It often starts with small things, like criticism or yelling. Over time, these behaviors can become more extreme and dangerous. If you see signs of an abusive relationship in yourself or someone you care about, it’s important to reach out for help. Support from family and friends, as well as professional resources, can be invaluable in helping someone get out of an abusive relationship. It’s also important to seek support if you’re unsure whether your partner is abusive. According to research, there are several questions that may indicate whether a person may have an abusive personality:

1) Does your partner criticize you?

2) Is your partner possessive?

3) Does your partner yell at you?

4) Does your partner force intimacy without consent?

5) Does your partner threaten violence against you or others?

6) Does your partner use drugs or alcohol to keep you under control?

7) Has your partner ever hit, kicked, choked, bite, shoved, pinned down, burned or threatened any pets while they were angry at them? These are clear indication someone may have aggressive behavior.

No matter how many apologies are said, they are not real. These are just words of pitty to keep you from leaving. You build a defense that is anger from the hurt of deception, lying, cheating and self destruction. You feel embarrassed by letting this happen for so long. You feel stuck and sadly you stay. It’s a horrible cycle that cycles more abuse in time. When you think it would get better, it’s hell to pay to try to leave. It gets much worse, than it had been before. A vicious cycle where trying to survive is unpredictable. It becomes a known feeling it’s time to leave. It’s only something you know for yourself.

The breaking point
It had been months, those months became years, since the whispers of his anger had begun. At first, it seemed like something I could ignore, a feeling of unease that was brushed off as nothing more than a passing emotion. But as the days turned into weeks, and the weeks into months, and years, it became clear that this wasn’t just some passing feeling—it was something far more sinister.
The outbursts had grown in intensity, turning into full-blown tantrums filled with screams, shouts, and threats. It was like living in an emotional minefield, never knowing when I might set off an explosion. And then, on that fateful morning at 5:14am, the breaking point was reached.

His hand had reached out and grabbed my throat, and for the first time, I felt completely powerless. The terror I felt in that moment was something I will never forget. All of my senses were heightened, and all I wanted was for it to end. But as his whiskey-soaked breath spewed out more vile words, I knew that there was no going back. This was the moment when I realized that I had to get out of this abusive relationship.
In the days that followed, I made the difficult decision to leave. Despite the heartache and pain that came with it, I knew that it was the only way to free myself from this dark situation. Looking back now, it’s hard to believe that I allowed myself to be trapped in such an abusive environment for so long. But thankfully, I have been able to move forward and heal from this traumatic experience.

Today, I am still thriving to find a healthy relationship with someone who respects me and treats me well. Where there is no longer any fear or anxiety surrounding what he might say or do next; instead, be able to talk through our problems together and find solutions that work for us both. Someone who will help me to reclaim my independence and build up my self-esteem again after years of being told how worthless I am. Even though you’re well aware of the words falsely tossed in the air. No matter how strong you are, those words still affect you in time.

When you are stuck in an abusive relationship, it can feel like you are walking on eggshells every day, never knowing when you might trigger your partner’s rage again. Just know that you don’t need to put up with abuse anymore–there are plenty of resources available that can help you take control of your life again!

Every day she thought about leaving but found herself constantly battling an inner voice that was too scared to move forward. As much as she wanted to escape, she was petrified of facing life alone, so she stayed locked in a perpetual cycle of suffering. The inner demon is a battle itself. I want to be free but my heart speaks a different language. Staying is a cycle that can’t be explained. You’re in a situation that you know is wrong, you know it’s horrible and a powerful mind game that keeps you there. It’s something you can’t express or explain.

That is my home too. It’s a painful way knowing it’s not a choice. It’s a mind game…. To be continued

Until our beautiful minds meet again be safe out there. Much love and many blessings. Remember Everyday Minds Matter-Della 💞🦋

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💔Relationship between Psychology and Mental Health – It doesn’t have to be Complicated 💔

Pyschology and Mental Health
Psychological effects of Mental Health. Photo by elifskies on Pexels.com

Have you ever thought about the relationship between psychology and mental health? Psychology has a long history of being a discipline that addresses the mind, but it’s only recently that mental health and psychology have started to intersect.

When we talk about mental health and psychology, it’s important to remember that this is not a new concept. We’ve been talking about our mental health since the 19th century—we just didn’t have the right words for it! But as we’ve discovered more about ourselves and learned how our minds work, we’ve come to realize that there are many ways that we can improve our mental well-being.

Psychology is a field devoted to understanding the workings of the human mind. It uses behavioral science techniques like observation and experimentation to gather information about people’s thoughts, feelings, beliefs, attitudes, values and behaviors (among other things). Psychologists try to understand how those things relate to one another and how they influence an individual’s mood or behavior.

In recent years, psychologists have begun looking at how these same factors affect someone’s mental health. They use this knowledge to help individuals who struggle with anxiety or depression or other forms of emotional distress.

The relationship between mental health and psychology is a complicated one. On the one hand, there are a handful of factors that can be used to predict who will develop mental health problems: being female, having a family history of mental illness, having a low income, and so on. On the other hand, what we actually mean by “mental health” is subjective and varies from person to person. And even when we look at things like “general mental well-being,” it’s not clear whether that metric should be applied universally or only within certain populations—like young people with learning disabilities or older adults looking for new hobbies.

So what does all this mean? Well, if you’re trying to figure out if someone has problems with their mental health, you have to take into account all sorts of different factors—and no one factor can be considered more important than any other.

The psychology of mental health is a very complex subject. There are many factors that can contribute to someone having a mental disorder, and even more that can be involved in the treatment of these disorders.

In order to understand how psychology relates to mental health, it is important to first understand what psychology is. Psychology is the study of behavior, thought, and emotion. It includes not only the scientific study of these things but also their biological basis. Psychology also encompasses the social application of these theories so that they can be applied in everyday life.

Understanding how certain psychological factors may cause someone’s mental health issues can help them get better faster while they are still able to receive treatment. Options such as counseling or medication therapy, which everyone may differ due to chemical makeup are not the same for each individual.

Mental health and psychology is an important topic that should be discussed in every home. Mental health is one of the most important things in life, and it is important that you are aware of your own mental state. If you are having trouble with your mental health, then you should seek help from a professional.

Mental health can be defined as “the state of someone’s mind or emotions, especially when they are functioning well rather than being mentally unwell”. It can also include the ability to think clearly, process information and make decisions.

Mental health issues can affect anyone at any age, race or gender. There are many different types of mental health problems including depression, anxiety disorder, bipolar disorder and schizophrenia. In order to prevent these issues from occurring in the future it is important that families understand what these issues mean and how they affect people around them through their actions and words spoken aloud.”

The relationship between mental health and psychology is an interesting one, because they are both so closely related. The two fields are both concerned with the study of human behavior, but they have different goals. Psychology is focused on understanding what drives people to act in certain ways, while mental health is focused on helping people who are experiencing problems deal with those issues.

While both fields are important, it’s important to remember that there isn’t a one-to-one relationship between mental health and psychology. Some psychologists may specialize in treating mental illness, but others do not work directly with clients suffering from these conditions.

Mental health is a state of well-being, in which an individual realizes his or her own capabilities and seeks to use them for personal fulfillment. Mental health problems are diagnosed when an individual has either a clinically diagnosable mental disorder or symptoms that cause significant impairment in various life activities.

Psychology is the scientific study of behavior and mental processes. Psychologists try to understand the mind and behavior by studying both the individual and their environment, using scientific methods such as observation, experimentation, and measurement. A psychologist’s job may include researching human behavior at work or at home, designing programs to help people change their behavior, training professionals in how to treat or manage people with psychological conditions such as depression and anxiety attacks, designing programs to help children learn new skills (such as reading), testing new drugs that treat mental illnesses such as schizophrenia or bipolar disorder, or working with animals (such as dolphins) to learn more about human emotions and behavior.

Understanding that psychology is the way of thinking. Mental health is the state of mind and well- being. The ability to connect the two are fundamentals of mental health. Finding the connection can be interesting. Psychology and mental health share fascinating facts and knowledge.

Until our beautiful minds meet again. Be safe out there. Many blessings and much love. Remember. Everyday Minds Matter – Della💞

🌳Behavior Triggered by Others Actions

When you see your behavior as a reaction to other people’s actions, it can help you handle the situation differently. This is because it shifts your focus away from trying to control their behavior, which you have no power over. Instead, take time to think about what they might be doing with their behavior and what this means for you.

It’s important to remember that even though we may not always have control over another person’s actions, we do always have control over our own responses and behaviors. If someone else makes a decision that affects us negatively (for example by leaving us without adequate notice), then we need to let go of any expectations that they should behave differently in the future so that we don’t continue feeling upset about it or blaming them for how we feel now or in the future.

Emotions

The next area of human behavior we examine is emotions. Emotions are the result of our thinking and experiences, but they can also be incredibly helpful in guiding us to make decisions that benefit us or others.

Emotions are a part of human behavior and can be positive or negative. They can help us make better decisions by helping us to see things from a different perspective and allow ourselves room for change as well as growth.

Thoughts, beliefs and assumptions

Your thoughts, beliefs and assumptions are the foundation for your behavior. You will want to be able to recognize when they are not helpful and change them so that you can be more effective in managing your behavior.

Some examples of a thought: “I’m going to lose my job.”

A belief: “If I get fired again it’s because I’m not good enough.”

An assumption: If I do not have a job then my family will suffer financially.

When we say something like “I am going to lose my job” we make an assumption based on what we think someone else might say if they were aware of our thoughts. We create this story about ourselves that often makes us feel powerless and out of control over the situation – which can lead us into feelings such as frustration or anger towards others (i.e., blaming).

Triggers behind your actions

Triggers are the reason behind your actions. They can be positive or negative.

The positive triggers are what pushes you to do things, such as when a friend asks you to go out to eat and you feel excited about it. The negative triggers are what makes you want to avoid doing things, such as when someone says they don’t want to hang out with you and it makes you feel sad or angry.

When identifying your triggers, ask yourself: “What led me here?” or “What was going through my mind at that time?” This will help determine what is causing these feelings so they can then be changed!

How can I change my trigger? If something happens that causes negative emotions in me (like feeling sad), maybe try talking about it with someone I trust instead of avoiding them like I usually do! That way we both get some support from the other person instead of just one person feeling bad about themselves because their plans have been cancelled due to their own behavior patterns!”

Commitment

Commitment is the spark that lights the fire of change. The more a person is committed to an outcome, the more likely he or she will achieve it. If you want to make significant changes in your life, you need to make a significant commitment along with it.

You can’t expect one small leap forward after another to have any lasting impact on your life; however, if you are going big or going home (or both), these small leaps will add up over time and transform into something much bigger than they seem at first glance.

This applies not only to behavioral changes but also new habits as well—if you want your new habit of flossing every night at bedtime become ingrained in your routine (and ultimately part of who you are), then it’s time for some serious commitment action!

Commitments come in all sizes: some are smaller commitments like “I’m going go running tomorrow morning,” while others are larger commitments such as “I will lose 20 pounds by my 30th birthday.”

To change your behavior you must first understand it better.

The first step to changing your behavior is to understand it better. You must understand that behavior is a response to a trigger. It is not something that happens randomly or without reason, but rather it occurs because of some sort of stimulus in your environment or life. The second thing you must know before changing your behavior is that all positive changes start with motivation and commitment. If you are not willing to commit yourself fully and completely then nothing will ever change in any way shape or form!

Behavior and action, have thought us the triggers are caused by emotions, actions, and behavior. To make change its important to understand the reason of behavior. The more we understand the cause of behavior, known as the triggers, we are able to respond differently. Emotions can result to behaviors to others actions. Knowing how to stop poor behavior will reduce emotional response. Be committed to understanding triggers, so you can manage behavior and actions. Allowing the natural abilities to help reduce unpredictable actions..

Until our minds meet again. Be safe out there, blessings and much love. Remember, Everyday Mind’s Matter 🦋

Journaling Daily 🌺

Paper, Pen, & Positive Results

Today we are going to talk about the benefits of daily journaling that will change your life so you can improve yourself. Keeping a daily diary can help you become more self-aware, which will help you increase your knowledge of what is right for you. One aspect of journaling that makes it so effective is that journaling can become a key habit to help you focus your energy and attention on where it will be most effective. Of course, every time you can keep an effective diary, that time is well spent, but the best practice is to keep a regular daily diary.    

It’s often helpful if you keep a journal regularly, even if you don’t have to do it every day. You can certainly learn more about yourself by looking back at what you do every day, but journaling is often more than just recording everyday events. As mentioned, journaling can help you reflect on yourself, sort out your feelings, and gain a deeper understanding of the various events that occur in your daily life. Let’s look at the importance of journaling and how to incorporate this powerful habit into your daily routine.    

You can use a diary to write down affirmations that will help you reach your goals or keep track of memories so you can reflect on how your life is going. Journaling allows us to put our emotions on paper, separate them from ourselves, organize our thoughts, our days, our intentions. Writing about feelings, environment, and activities without judgment can help you be more present in everyday life. Simply writing about your feelings and frustrations will help you focus on what is really going on in your life and mind so you can find solutions to your problems.  Most importantly, journaling can help problem solve situations. Fixing relationships or issues by understanding the problem. Then a solution can be organized and resolved.  You are more aware of the thoughts and feelings now they are written out.Most importantly, journaling can help problem solve situations.  Fixing relationships or issues by understanding the problem. Then a solution can be organized and resolved.  You are more aware of the thoughts and feelings now they are written out.

For example, talking about specific relationship problems can help you better understand your emotional needs and how to meet them. Writing can help you tune into the situation and “feel” if something is wrong with the other person or situation. A journal is also a useful tool to help you make emotionally clouded decisions and know when it’s time to make changes because you’ve been writing the same thing day in and day out for weeks at a time. Creating a writing routine and scheduling time for journaling can help keep you on track even on days when you don’t feel inspired.    

One of the best things you can do to set yourself up for success when you figure out how to start a daily diary (or any other habit) is to make it as accessible as possible. If you want to make it a habit, choose a time of day for journaling and make it a non-negotiable in your life. 

When we have a daily journaling routine, we reap the many benefits of journaling, such as increased self-esteem, self-awareness, awareness, and positivity, every single day. A diary should not be just the act of writing paper on paper and recording the mundane events of your day. For example, incorporating a 20-minute diary into your nightly routine can help you relieve heavy feelings of stress before bed.  

Importance of journaling has so many benefits. Time is only your favor to journal in habit. Once routine takes place, in no time you can better understand yourself. Having opportunity to feel, and acknowledge your needs and desires are rewarding.

Until next, keep that pen moving, enjoy the writing experience- of journaling. Until our minds meet again. Be safe out there, blessings and much love. Remember Everyday Mind’s Matter.🌸👣

🛴Footing … Dial-Up ….. Co..nec..ting..

Flintstones

Meet the Flintstone’s, a time in history when life was priceless. I am honored to be a Flintstone.  Dad worked, mom took care of the household.  A rotary phone, shared with everyone in the house..  There was no secrets, ear hustling- no one listened to conversations.  We ran back outside to play if someone was on the phone.  If you made a phone call- either no one was home or the line was busy.  If it were important we went to their house.  Going through those big phone books, searching names that offered endless laughter. Prank calls, the laughter of being a silly kid. No being able to trace the call had it’s purpose- at the moment.  Following the cord or picking up the other phone- an awkward silence at times.

Gas stations and some grocery stores were closed on Sunday’s. A day when families enjoyed drives /rides, visiting friends or family out of town. Families had in person quality time. Sitting in the living room or outside conversation about everything. Listening to older relatives childhood stories, had offered knowledge and laughter. If we wanted to know something, hands on was taught through physical labor. Manual labor had no limit or boundaries. Chores had appreciation, respect, love, and support behind it.

Communication has no barriers. Calling relatives were every week on certain days. Routine and frequently kept for years. Staying in touch was priority for family and friends for connect was important. Sleepover with friends- no problem our parents met in person. Being dropped off and picked up- only source of GPS. Brown bag or a lunchbox with thermos- total excitement for a school field trip. Your lunch ticket- your ability to prove responsibility. Relationships with others in school, were influences to how we interact and communicate. These skills from peers and teacher were priority stepping stones; needed, later in life.

Riding bikes, catching frogs, gardening, barefoot and bee strings

Developmental skills learnt at childhood, are triggers, and reinforces needed to become an adult. Every experience as a child, reflect coping abilities, and knowledge of life. Not everyone has the same knowledge to cope with anger, loss, or pain. Catching frogs, riding bikes, or barefoot getting stung by a bee, are testing abilities of character. Reaction to a bee sting is tolerance and strength. Those little pest can hurt, but mentally can prove one’s tolerance to pain. Balance is technique used to establish coordination to ride a bike. These are just simple task performed and applied to developmental growth. Being Open-Minded is fundamentals applied to learning practices. Education and resources utilized, enhance experiences that offer personal growth and new opportunities.

Flintstones main source for building; manual labor- hands on and experience. Most reasonable creative abilities, were by imagination and mental technique. How to make the best from supplies available. Using your feet sourced transportation. Transportation, in which, had no complaints. Toughness of feet provided movement. No battery, radio, or rear view mirrors were known of.. Yet survival to maintain – those did just fine. As Flintstones life was Yabba- Dabba, dooo… Appreciation and respect was in every home. Conflict was rare, as basic supplies were the essentials to live. As the world began to populate, intelligence developed. From dinosaur speed and peace of mind, happiness, and comfortable. Humans evolved to speed and advancement. We become greedy wanting more.. more of everything, our need grew and grew…. And soon out of the sky!!!

Meet The Jetson’s – WIFI Speed

The little man was bought out, cost of living went up. A world of speed, greed, and the mighty dollar took control. Both parents had to work, and children had sitters. Gardens had no purpose, as demand grew artificial intelligence took charge. Boxed and canned food demand created processing factories. Speed had generated intelligence to control the world. Advanced technology, took the world and shook the little man. The hand made of manual labor lost its shine, when the ole’ mighty dollar came alive.

A separation in class divided the rich and poor. Children picked at or criticized other kids by financial status. A change took over so fast in the late 1990’s rotary phones became cordless, you could now leave messages on an answering machine. A monitor and keyboard – a computer, wow how expensive they were. Advancement of intelligence, at high demand in the world.

A simple life in history, as chaos, filled conflict, stress, and cable television- opened the news. News around the world, A new age, violence, robbery, crime of multiple levels, influence that created problems. Negative news; ripped and stole positive energy of our youth, neighbors, family, and friends. A moment in time, the need for speed influenced, greed. Greed to out do, be better, make more money, and advance with speed a Jetson. Friends fell out, family turned on one another. The daily news seemed to open negative influences into homes. Created challenging motives to empower money and self imagine. We have created a monster that continues to grow. Rapid speed..

And an extremely powerful connection happened. An artificial intelligence. The stepping stones, to modern light, to what we live today. Evil technology speed that controls our lives. Intelligence that destroyed family, friends, jobs, children’s developmental values. Communication is texting, social media vs. talking in person. Discipline is not an option, because knowing your child or friend is interaction. Interaction and productive communication no longer exist. Relationships have went to shit. Children and grandchildren depend on parents & grandparents, now days. Those important connections are broken by technology. No time fot interaction or personal involvement.

Children don’t know the struggles of looking up “capsule” in a dictionary or “mars” in an encyclopedia. We helped each other if we didn’t know or understand something. Parents have used technology as sitters. Truth is technology has raised our children. Friends are online- no longer outside to interact or play… Bullying is the new cyber playground. Instead of helping each other – to hurt someone or belittle is the new trend. Structured families are rare. * If you remember; getting up to change the cable channel, (having to slide the ticker to a channel), on a floor model tv. Most of all; we gathered in the living room to watch a movie, had popcorn, or watch weekly shows together. – continuing these practice- you are parents of 1970’s to 1980’s Flintstone’s. Big Yabba- Dabba Do, well accomplished.**

In history, tools needed in today’s world, no longer exist. Resources offered are fading away. As new advancements awaken, the manual labor is pushed out. The final destination has arrived; Technology.

Time Evolved Chaos Happened “” NO“” Longer Offer Generation Youth

This my friends, new generations have no youth development morals or survival skills. Today the technology advancement– destroyed manual labor and hands on skills and work ethic. Manual labor– the mind advanced artificial intelligence, a human robot. The ability preformed manual labor into a operation through Proof that Everyday Mind’s Matter. Technology has ruined relationships, destroyed morals, and formed addictions….

Bitter truth, we face is the history can not erased or re-written. What we created is artificial intelligence to comfort and addiction. Poisonous entertainment coverage from phone to phone. Education has lost the core of intelligence. An escape and easy way to answers, solution, and divorce. We can’t visit Aunt Sally 2 miles away. But you better believe, face-time and snap chat sent with emojis, your busy will be sent. Excuses to visit in person, we are so busy doing social media shit, that social distancing is history. Social distancing had played into our busy lives, it was a “thing”; hideous barriers set to avoid live connections. Addictions of technology has mental health at a record high level.

Technology has raised our children. Children don’t know the meaning of affection and love. Robbed by technology we don’t even realize… Yes, I say this with heartfelt pain. Our level of acceptance, to love has lesser value. Our closeness to others are at a social stand still.

Take a minute and take this in…. Have you attended any funerals in the past couple years? Has the world lost emotions? Sentimental touch? Empathy or compassion? Tears must be left at the door or of history. Do we not see what our time has created? Are relationship at such social distancing; that, pain has no time or place for tears? Have relationships changed before our eyes, that it’s normal to no longer express emotions? Hell no, we are conditioned with stimulus. And without a deep connection, there are no emotion connection to tears. My friends, take a deep breath. Life is a precious gift. Time can not be place on pause to rewind.. When your final days approach- will your legacy be written in Flintstone’s – Stone Age? Or will your legacy Fly with the Jetsons – lost in speed? Or lastly- will the addiction of technology; form the trace of your legacy? Are you a man who covered social media with endless post on women’s profiles? A man who wanted to experience life to ultimate highs. Blocking emotions and attachments to others, selfish pleasure– to satisfy your desire and needs? Or a women who preyed on dating sites, — aging with time to find a sugar daddy vs. real love? Technology has deleted our connection to empathy, compassion, and our real character. Our needs, desire, and greed has created addiction within our minds.

Our relationships are not built on love. Love has settled to a comfort zone, that we believe is okay — overtime.. Lust and temptations have no boundaries. After all there’s no emotional ties to comfort. Our excuse is we’re busy. We don’t have time. Right, we don’t take time to understand ourselves. Our happenings, our worlds have been rocked by divorce, deceit, lies, broken homes, and overtime– we accept– nothing. We just find a replacement. Our mind and body are off balance. Acting in impulse, no one wants to feel pain. So we condition the pain, — a false emotion to hide behind. To communicate with our partners, in person has faded. Why? In our world today– an ability to perform a live connection– just conflicts creating a barrier. Corrupted our minds to shut off– a secret auto pilot that gets us by. In no time, social distancing has expanded in outside relationships. Tucked in our own shell of excuse or existence. Conditioned to no longer deal with feelings, emotions, or cope with uncomfortable situations. Why not convert to being open-minded? Change your relationship status to live connection and welcome conversation. Bring back history, close temptation; reconnect with Dial-Up. You might find something meaningful; you never experienced. Maybe take a step behind- – create the Flintstones life. Jetsons or technology life has depleted manual labor. But you can still grow a garden, limit texting and open dinner time as a family. Everyone sit at the table no cell phones, talk about your day. Enjoy the interaction to express your character. Its great to be a Flintstones, no stress, no chaos, no distractions. Live connection, that’s says ” I am right, here”! A feeling that you can’t deny– a connection heart to heart.

Until our minds meet again, Be safe out there, much love and blessings.. Remember Everyday Minds Matter! 😘😇

🏕Our Hidden Path

Secret Direction to Purpose

Oh, the world we live in today! Wouldn’t life be much simpler at times, if we had instructions or directions? Be to easy to navigate through our challenges and obstacles. We are late in discovery most time with everyday life, or overlook what we could of had long before. My purpose and hidden path.

Growing up in the county, 80’s and 90’s. – a peace of mind- tranquility, A time in history; outside at night,  echo’s of bullfrog carried through the woods.  Crickets a pain in the ass, lighting bugs, routine catching at nightfall.  Running through mud puddles after a good rain, drinking from the garden hose, and the joy of weeding the garden. Snapping green beans for canning, shucking corn on the cobb, cucumber for pickling, and berries for jam.  Watching dad fix the lawn mower or replacing brakes on the car.

An elderly couple lived on the driveway to my house. Maybe to be a pest or be nosey. Of course, visiting or getting in their way, likely got on their nerves. To me it was nice to check in on them when needed or just to visit to check new projects. Old man Clyde had a wood shed where he spent his time. Shep a boarder collie, like Lassie the TV show. Shep was old but he let us play, but watched as we picked tomotoes from the garden. Every moment was learning tools when Clyde explain his projects he was working on. One day Clyde was tinkering with a push mower-  sparked to gasoline; the whole shed in flames. Playing outside seeing the blaze- running to our uncle, he rushed to help. Old man Clyde so determined to save his burning shed – he suffered burns. Not wanting to go for treatment, conveinced he had too. Ambulance eventually took old man Clyde to hospital. Later told he had 1st degree burns trying to extinguish the blaze. Once Clyde got released to come home. Not hesitating to help his recovery; change bandages on his legs or check the mail. Or carrying in groceries was always worth a pack of gum and .50 cent or $1.00. He recovered over time. His wife was always glad to see me, she knew it took chores off her. Evaline was a fragile as her body was slow moving at times. I help with hanging curtains up and house hold things if needed. While at school, Evaline tried to change curtians, slipped from the stool broke her hip.

Caregiver become priority each day, after school. Positioning pillows, laundry, or help with other household chores, I was there. Just as her strength improved, she started using a walker, happiness covered my face.  Her recovery gave me joy since it took a lot of work.  Friendship had a special place deep in the heart.  One afternoon after school; knocking on the door- no answer. The car was gone but she was always home. Something was different. Mom was outside as I walked down the driveway. Starting to cry, mom hugged me saying she will write or call. She went to live with her daughter in Indiana.  Unable to say good-bye, heart broke, thinking my best friend didn’t say good-bye.  My days walking past the trailer, wondering if she thought of me. That day carried a weight–; good-bye’s hold much love– bring tears to my eyes.  Reunited visits of family or friends capture the heartfelt love of joy. And we all know the final days of life good-bye’s, can’t be prepared for. Endless tears….

As a young girl, everything inside was torn apart. Weak feeling, crying, and angry, wanting to be alone. What had happened? Kids aren’t suppose to be sad.  Every part of me, experienced hurt. Waiting for a letter or phone call from my friend. Mom and I had tried a few times, to contact her. The phone number she left– no answer.  Not a single letter in the mail.

To ease the pain, I wrote my friend many letters.  With no response, writing in a journal gave my heart relief. Over time, thinking about her many days. In my world, I knew she lost my address and number, to me she lived forever somewhere.

A plan was created written in crayon, marker, sealed with stickers and pink nail polish. Written by a brown eyed, brown haired 7-year-old- just in case she forgot about me.

  Everyday Minds Matter – mental health and well-being set the path for everyone. Establish practice to focus, retention, and concentration; healthy habits to prevent obstacles in mental status.  Overcome mental health challenges faced that affect daily routine. 

Writing that filled notebooks, diaries, and scrap paper- focused on my future dream.

In little time, old man Clyde move away. It was diffetent for a moment. Then one day, my mamaw- (fathers’ mom) move in the trailer.  The void was filled. Not skipping a beat; my brother and I had mamaw to aggravate.  With no time to waste, enjoying my childhood– documented every step of the way. Seems that the conversations grew on me. It was interesting to listen to my mamaws childhood. In my eyes it was more than interesting. A world where play was all work. In the early 1900’s not many toys were made. Everything from learning and entertainment was outdoors. Friends weren’t always close so most were visiting relatives.

A path to being a caregiver seemed to start young. Looking back I seemed to fall into the right path. Life takes us places and sometimes times passes- that all makes sense. Did you think back to your hidden path? How accurate did your role as a child play to your work or career choice?

Until our minds meet again.. Be safe out there and remember Everyday Minds Matter

🗄An Army of One – Learning To Be Your Own Best friend

Army of One
Photo by Specna Arms on Pexels.com

Stressed, tired, feeling unbalanced, weak, and unpredictable at the moment? Your not alone, we all have faced troubling, soul shaking tragedy in this lifetime. How you faced the world day in, day out – you did one day at a time. When two feet give you direction, life challenges- two feet for balance and it’s body and mind – Life. Life challenged your faith, lost hope, one foot on the edge, one foot burning in pain… to make the next move, one finger on the ledge, determined to be focused manage to pull grip – climbed up – one grip at a time. The defeat; a beat and fragile body, unsure the consequences of one more pull and grip? Extreme pain rips beyond every fiber throughout your body. Sweat rolls off your eyebrow, yet you can’t do anything about it, unless you choose to fall.. Life’s ledge and edges aren’t designed with great effort. Life edges are sharp with deep rugged roads From beneath the breathe, a force of strength comes alive. Courage, fire, and fearless, emerged from an inner voice, “you got this”. A voice that determines the result of the next step, grip, and result to Life. That one friend who nearly everytime, will save your ass? You got it! “Your mind”!

We all go through hard times in life and face many challenges that can leave us feeling exhausted, overwhelmed and unsure of how to cope. But we don’t have to give up – with the right mindset and focus we can push through the difficult moments. Life is like a ledge or edge – it can be sharp, deep and rugged at times. We might find ourselves teetering on the edge with one foot burning in pain and uncertain of what the consequences will be if we take the next step forward. At times like this, courage and strength emerge from within as an inner voice encourages us to keep going and assures us “you got this”. This voice is often our greatest friend – it helps save our lives when everything else fails. That ‘inner friend’ is our mind! It’s crucial to tap into our mental resilience when things get tough so that we can focus on the solution rather than the problem and make it through difficult moments unscathed. Though life may seem unpredictable, uncertain and challenging at times, if we hold onto our mental strength and focus on the positive then we will eventually pull ourselves back up, one grip at a time.

Often we think of ourselves as singular beings – one body, one mind. But the truth is that our body and mind are deeply interconnected and rely on each other for balance and wellbeing. The relationship between the two is so important that we must fight to protect it throughout our lives. When faced with darkness in life, we may sometimes be tempted to wash away what we see in the mirror and deny our true self concept. In these moments, it’s crucial to pause and reflect: how am I feeling? What emotions am I experiencing? Do I feel balanced on an axel like an army of one, or twisted, tilted and tested? Only when we accept and understand both the body and mind are in harmony .

It’s good to sit and chill. Take a minute and embrace the moment. You can learn so much in such short time. Encourage routine, a simple smile can circulate for miles. If you catch a smile, it cycled properly, smile again it’s working.😁

Relationships or Friendships

Your mind is not just a friend. Your mind is the master to all commands. Every step of the day, every breath, and creation body and soul. Conflict within can or will take your mind to dark negative places. Your self-concept – friend has only one need, “Balance”. You must work well to compromise in life as best friends. To overcome emotional, physical, and mental challenges – become an army of one. – Body and mind – That one best friend that has strength, and energy to overcome, One mind and one body – an Army of One. Positive energy will generate healthy habits.

Of course we have outside influences of individual known as friends. The outer friends can offer happiness to life, new friends share influences to our personal space. To allow friends into our recruiting lounge, being open minded is needed. Determine the influences and requirements to establish friendship. How does each friend influence your army? Positive energy or negative energy? When energies connect the influences combine forming the friendship. Friendships require us to maintain our self concept army on a regular basis. Once the alignment pulls away, unwelcomed habits form and bad habits become normal. Influences are sought by the energy of environment and relationships.

Bitter “Truth” a separation of body and mind; is destruction waiting to happen. The one relationship you must fight for your entire journey in life – becoming an Army of One. When your eyes went dark, you washed them off,.. looking in the mirror that moment, glancing at yourself: what did you see? what did you say? What do you have to say to your self concept – best friend? What emotions are you feeling? Are you balanced on axel as an Army of One? Or twisted, tilted, and tested?

If you journal release some self-concept energy to yourself. How will you handle a situation you might be dealing with now? Write a journal entry to yourself. What issues are you aware of that are disconnecting your body and mind? If you like please feel free to use comments to share thoughts and offer feedback.

Until our beautiful minds meet again, be safe out there. Many Blessings and much love. Remember Everyday Minds Matter!🤗

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