Do you lash out verbally when someone cuts you off in traffic or does your blood pressure go through the roof when something does not go your way? Feeling angry is a perfectly normal and healthy instinct. However, when anger is excessive or uncontrollable, it becomes destructive and can lead to problems at work, in your relationships and in your overall life.
Our anger management is based on cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). To get in control of your anger, you must challenge the thoughts and behaviors that cause the anger. With the guidance of your therapist, you will be able to identify your personal triggers that make you angry with yourself or others and you will learn how to react in proportion to these triggers. You will be able to respond to your anger in a totally different way, by just letting go of the anger or acting in a different and more harmonious way. With the help of CBT, you will learn to accept and forgive and develop self-control over your thoughts and actions so that you can live life without excessive and uncontrollable anger.
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When you are uncontrollably angry, it is normal to say and do things you do not really mean but the impulse to react is too strong at that moment. When your anger gets out of control, the consequences can be very serious. There are no limits to what it will lead to for yourself and others.
“If walls could talk”, the walls of a hundred-year-old farmhouse would tell history.. Built in 1923, solid wood, and the finest material money could buy. A farmhouse structured to settle on many acres surrounding to harvest and farm, a farmhouse foundation to riches of life.
My wood has witnessed so much over the years, including the bustle of family gatherings, the hum of conversations, and the laughter of children playing late into the night. I’ve seen birthdays, holidays, and Sunday afternoons. I remember long summer days when the wind rushed in through the open windows, carrying with it the smell of grass and lilac and honeysuckle. I have witnessed years of changes and watched as people moved away and others took their place.
The walls of this old farmhouse have seen much joy and sorrow over the years. For generations, families have come to gather and live, building memories around the fireside, laughter from the long tables, and the warmth of a hearty meal. But behind the walls, in the spaces between, the stories the walls tell can never truly be told. Perhaps in the rooms and hallways, voices are heard and memories fade in and out of existence, echoing throughout the structure. From newlyweds giggling and enjoying the days of love and naivety to families trying to make sense of tragedy, the walls saw and heard it all. As babies were born and a family started, laughter erupted, along with stories and arguments. Evil hands that covered innocent faces. Not every story would be humored or joyful. The walls carry dark troubled times as well.
Within these walls, church was held, class was taught, bank trading, and deals were done. Hard labor was manual and respect was taught. Values had priority in order to learn wisdom. Walls structured for challenges and hope, peace, and love. Weather would test its structure over time. Someone always came along and fixed me up making proper repairs.
On winter nights, cold and snow seeping in through cracks and gaps, the walls became an intimate theatre, displaying deep conversations between people in love, grappling with hope, heartache and deep questions. From the attic to the barn and beyond, if the walls could talk they’d speak of deep connections and loyalty between neighbors, help that came when least expected and giving when it wasn’t asked. These walls saw sleepless nights, painful memories and special occasions all become memories stored away forever, like so much dust and dirt tucked into every nook and cranny of this family home. The walls are strong, but their secrets still linger. Each generation is added to this story, creating new ones to replace the fading ones of years past. Though time passes and generations come and go, these walls are steadfast in their silence. But if they could talk, what stories would they tell?
The farm house had seen its share of joys and sorrows over the years. If the walls could speak, it would tell the story of families living through a devastating harvest failure. Struggling to make ends meet and make their land last. Late nights filled with sorrow and fear of losing their family’s legacy. But in the same breath, the walls would speak of the immense joy and love felt within these four walls. Through times of great celebration, it saw couples get married, grandchildren playing in the living room, and homemade meals enjoyed with family and friends.
Harvest failures, desperate hopes, tears and sweat, and the pain of the family members all weighed heavily on the old house. One could imagine the strained conversations held by the family members over whether or not they would make it through the season. There were surely times of deep sorrow, as members of the family had to let go of beloved parts of the farm as financial struggles worsened. And as the walls held in the past, they witnessed each successive generation gather together, trying their best to keep the old farm alive, their sweat and efforts creating an invisible bond between the generations, uniting them despite the distances of time. If the walls could talk, surely their voices would be those of perseverance and courage, ringing through the halls of the farmhouse and resounding in the memories of its inhabitants.
The stories would speak of hope and dreams, love and loss, faith and doubt. They would bring joy and pain, laughter and tears. For generations, these walls have held a unique place in this family’s lives, providing strength and shelter. Though the stories within may remain forever unheard, they remain held deep within the structure of this old farmhouse.
One hundred years, 2023 my structure has loosened, and the seeking noise of broken shutters, rattle with the wind. The farm has decreased as family sold to develop. New fancy houses are closing in. Those houses are top of the line, here surround, just an old farmhouse.
I am here, silently absorbing it all, like a repository for the collective memories of generations of families. I can only imagine what the walls of this old farmhouse would say if they could talk. Stories of heartache and happiness, successes and failures, hope and despair. And so I plead with you – don’t let development erase my history. Don’t tear me down. Keep me standing, so that I may continue to be part of this incredible journey. Renovate history with a little love and care.
This old farmhouse has so much history to share. If only the walls could talk? Please let this old farm house stand proud just as the history that lives within these walls.
Sadly, in today’s day and age, my structure may not be long for this world. I stand, empty and forlorn, for a development threatens to tear me down and rob my life of its history and memory. Don’t let it be! I am a testament to a life once lived and a living piece of history that shouldn’t be forgotten. Please save me and remember what I stand for.
Until our minds meet again be safe out there. Many blessings and much love. Remember Everyday Minds Matter -Della 💞🦋
Feeling unsure about your mental health? Get the assistance you need with Online Therapy! No need to wait, connect in the comfort of your home. Click the link below to take advantage of the best services online. Remember your mental health is priority.
The world was spinning, day in and day out, with endless tasks and endless responsibilities. Everything seemed so meaningless, so fleeting. In a society plagued with economic decline and suffocating debt, where nothing was as it should be, life was a challenge. Everywhere you looked, there was pressure and expectation. Jobs that didn’t provide enough, costs that kept growing and time slipping away, creating a constant, stressful atmosphere. People had to adapt, learn new skills and try to create something of their own to make it through. I was one of those people. Feeling weighed down by all that life was throwing at me, I searched for something meaningful and stable.
I decided to go back to something that had been in my heart since I was a child: writing. I decided to focus on writing/ storytelling. My goal was to express stories of joy and hope, as well as sorrow and fear. By using my words to transport people to a different world, even if just for a moment, I wanted to remind them that there was always a chance for a better tomorrow. My writing was far from perfect, but with practice I was slowly becoming a better writer/storyteller. Soon, I was creating content for and reaching an ever-widening audience. The monetary rewards are unavailable, was always great, but the greater reward was the joy and contentment of doing something that I truly loved. Today, I am still a storyteller, creating stories that bring joy, laughter and knowledge to people in a world filled with fear and doubt. As my words reach more and more people, I know that I am making a difference in their lives and giving them hope in a chaotic and troubled world.
Once upon a time, in a small playground nestled in a rural corner of the world, the life of the children who used to gather there was far different than it is today. Long ago, there was little thought of economic or financial woes, or of where their future may lie. The days were filled with carefree play and youthful laughter as children tested their physical and mental boundaries on the equipment, finding solace in being able to freely express themselves in a safe, happy environment. But, with the onset of a global financial crisis and growing levels of inflation, the playground and its children have had to make a significant adjustment in the way they approach life. Where once the days were spent creating forts and towers, playing hide and seek and games of tag, the kids must now spend their free time gathering and growing their own food, scavenging for materials to barter, and devising strategies to make a living from their available resources. Gone are the days of simplistic enjoyment of one another’s company. For many of the kids at the playground, a job is the only viable way of providing for themselves and their families. There is little room for failure in the face of increasing hardship and mounting debt.
But amongst the change and upheaval of their current life, the playground kids have still managed to find time for self-expression. The vibrant colors of the play structures have been painted with poetry and images of hope, while some have taken up the art of story telling to capture their collective experience of the ever-evolving world around them. In a world where nothing is certain, one thing remains the same: the kids of the playground still keep hold of the powerful spirit of camaraderie and ingenuity, which ensures that even when the landscape of their life has changed, their stories of survival still remain.
Life can be full of unexpected challenges that can feel like too much to handle. It can feel like a heavy burden when stress and financial struggles are combined with other major challenges, leaving us feeling overwhelmed and unable to cope with the mental strain. This feeling is not uncommon and it’s important to remember that we’re never alone in facing difficult times.
Challenges We’ve all been there at some point in our lives, feeling completely overwhelmed and stressed due to the overwhelming challenges that life has presented us with. From financial struggles, work-related stress, or major life changes, we can often find ourselves feeling overwhelmed and unable to cope with the mental mess we are faced with. It’s important to remember that these situations are incredibly common and that you’re not alone. The key to managing overwhelming circumstances is developing strategies that allow you to find balance and create space between the overwhelming feelings and what you can do about them. Keep an organized notebook of important information. Try to plan a weekly routine, activities included. This can help manage time as well, so your not overwhelmed at last minute. When challenging situations arise, they won’t be so disruptive to your routine. It’s easy to overload our schedules and allowing time management to fall short in completing important task.
Manage Stress To help manage stressful situations, there are many activities you can try such as taking some deep breaths, talking with friends or family, doing something creative or trying meditation or mindfulness. Even getting some exercise or sleep can make a huge difference in our outlook and how we handle difficult circumstances. Taking some time for yourself to do activities you enjoy and setting achievable goals will help take your mind off of your troubles for a bit, allowing for greater clarity and focus when you face them again. Additionally, considering professional counseling can be incredibly beneficial when struggling with overwhelm, providing valuable insights into improving self-awareness, personal effectiveness and productivity in challenging times. No matter how tough things may seem right now, remember that we all go through hard times. There is relief, if we persevere and develop strategies to manage overwhelming feelings before they take control of our lives. So take a deep breath – you got this!
Thinking Positive In times of high stress and strain it is essential to ensure that we take care of our mental health first. We can do this by creating a positive mindset and trying to reframe negative thoughts into something more productive and encouraging. Positive thinking is essential when dealing with difficult circumstances as it helps us break through the barriers and access a calmness of mind which will help to better understand our current situation.
Taking breaks throughout the day from the stresses of life is essential in managing feelings of overwhelm. Having an escape such as reading a book, exercising outdoors, cooking or playing music will help provide a much-needed break for our minds which helps combat against any stresses or anxiety felt during these times.
Additionally, prioritizing your tasks and having an action plan in place is also beneficial in keeping on top of workloads. As it creates order rather than chaos; which again can aid in providing peace within ourselves when working towards completing objectives.
Talk it Out If you feel like your stress levels have become too much, it is important to talk to someone about how you’re feeling. Talking about what’s causing you distress can really help lift a weight off your shoulders. A therapist can provide professional support during tough times, or alternatively speaking to friends or family who will be understanding of your current struggles can be helpful.
Although there may be periods in life where we feel overly overwhelmed with pressures being placed upon us; remembering that we are not alone during these challenging moments. It’s vital as others around us will share similar stories they have faced in life’s turmoil’s. Taking time out for self-care such as meditating, exercise or hobbies provides welcome distractions whilst engaging in talks with therapists/friends/family is incredibly important in seeking assistance where/when needed. You got this👍
Until our beautiful minds meet again, be safe out there. Many blessings and much love. Remember Everyday Minds Matter -Della 💞🦋
When you feel like you’re addicted to something, it’s because you are. If you think about it, addiction is just a symptom of a problem. It’s not the problem itself—it’s what happens when you try to solve your problems with drugs or alcohol.
There are no pain killers that ease the pain of death. There is no pain killer in drug or alcohol form that solves any problem. My personal experience raw emotions over time, struggles of addiction and time in jail. Only one pain killer that is legit and real – Deal with it face to face. The truth is not easy, its painful, and a living hell at times. The truth is, it takes a long time to heal, cope, and deal with life events. Those challenges are open wounds. No one will admit to and wants to face – pain. My pain and struggles changed my life – forever.
Time is crucial to grief as I learnt the hard way. In my world, nothing made sense. Why? I couldn’t allow myself to feel raw emotions. Until I was forced to.
To me, I knew the pain would surface. For so long, I thought dodge ball would give me time to adjust. Time had lost its value, the world moved around me. I functioned due to that’s what life teaches us to do. The world doesn’t stop because you lost two loved ones seven weeks apart. The world doesn’t stop for anyone or anything.
Honestly, the days became a blank stare, everything moved as I stood still. My job at the time, was behind a computer. Thinking of the events was not happening while working. I choose to be a picker on a cherry picker. This the physical movement would keep my mind busy. I thought the grief had passed and life went on. Until….
September 11th, 2002. Brother that passed his birthday was Sept. 10th. That morning of the 9-11 year anniversary. In honor the company had moments of silence for both plane attacks. I buckled out of no where.. Functioning didn’t make sense. I hit my knees and fell apart. Crumbled to life raw painful emotions.. Six months after, life stopped. The only thing that matter at the moments was to leave. Walking in to my supervisors office, “I quit”. Out of character, he told me that I was okay. That I had time off work and just do whatever I could. Those words were not okay on my behalf. Once again, “I quit, you have no clue”. The HR lady called my name, and said here’s FLMA papers go to your doctor. They should give you time off work. She walked me to my car and explained the process. I went straight to my doctors office at that time. This doctor had been new and my first time meeting or seeing her. Explaining my situation, asking to help with FMLA. Her choice of words, did not go over well. She thought it was bogus to need time off work. Depression or anxiety, any of that she thought I was fine, just trying to get paid. My tolerance level just ticked. It was not the right time or practice of option, to her observation. I stood up and said, ” I hope you still have your father and your brother”. Quickly her response was ” yes I do”. I said that’s why you have no right to judge me, you have not experienced what I’m going through”. As your tongue was sharp, I hope you think next time before you share your opinion. When you can’t speak without experience just do your job. I got up to exit and my regular doctor was shocked. Leaving the office, I went to a doctor close by my house. I told the office I had just left my family doctors office and the situation. By law your not suppose to do that “doctor shopping”. I had not a care in hell, I needed help now. The doctor I seen was older, experienced, he knew I needed help. He personally made a phone call to the prior doctors office. Mentally I was a mess, yet I thought I was strong enough as time passed. Then falling apart, nothing was real. Emotions were painful, the triggers I was not aware of. The day after my brothers birthday. My mind starting thinking, remembering, wondering, and it happen. The anti-depression and anxiety medication were prescribed.
My days sleeping 15 to 20 hours a day. I must have been overwhelmed with exhaustion. If I woke up to eat or use the bathroom, daylight or night was never acknowledged. To shower was a big functioning task, that didn’t matter. Why should it when I’m just sleeping all the time, right? I became non-existent to the world. My mom would open my bedroom door check in on me. She had tried to make sense of it, her words would stick through my barely open eyes. ” I love you”, I heard many times. But I could barely move or function. Antidepressants became a non-functioning zombie creation, I hated more. My struggles were deep, changing medication made it worse. At some point over a course of 6 months time – my eyes opened more often. Hopeless, helpless, I needed help.. The struggles were daily, hourly, and serious. I suppose I got enough rest, cause I no longer wanted to sleep. Something inside of me was making sense. I rarely continued the medicine. So unconsciously I slowly detoxed from prescription medications. My only option was self-help. I began to write, as I would lay awake in bed thinking. I struggled with why would depression medicine make a person sleep.. ? Actually I started to feel worse taking the medicine. In time I was going back to work, the day was approaching. My mind was all over the place.
Slowly adding to my daily task, writing was priority and waking up was too. I had to face a lot of challenges. I had woken to a pending drug charge that was mine. My charges, my fault, not the addiction, – my problem. Not grieving, not understanding, not knowing, and hiding pain with addiction drugs and alcohol.
Functioning is a real struggle when life keeps moving. – Standing still is tough. But reality being crippled, disabled, mentally stopped in the tracks of life. Numb, thoughtlesss, living in a foggy world that I could only live in. I created this fog because I never learnt to function to death. Death- a zombie trying to drag ass through life. Life that’s so painful – crawling, due to, I been beaten, rolled, tossed, and shattered inside, and out. A hot mess in reality. I stank as a person because I didn’t know my strength. Giving up defeated me. I was all that above and more. Ripped, toren, high, drunk, and a walking mental mess.
Non-existent one where problems now surfaced and facing jail time. I felt invisible to jail, traumatized by life events, there was no excuse. My problems were my responsibility to be human again. Face life as I now had challenges. Obstacles that surely did want to face.
I had to report monthly to my parole officer. I had a great job, I was drug free and I honestly felt great. My goal was to conquer my grief with positive energy. At work, I pushed my limits to excel. But I felt alone. The lonleness created another addiction – sex. The truth is I was going to the gym working out, feeling great, going to the tanning bed, I never felt so amazing with ambition, life made sense. Or did it? My sex addiction was replaced from drug addiction. I made a promise to God to keep me safe and protect me during my journey of exploring sex options.. I refused to be attached to any man. I had lost two of my favorite men in my life. Loving a man was not an option at the time. My plan of action was in form of good habit routine. I was loving yet not lovable to my inner pain. My parole was about done. Drinking started regularly as my sex addiction slowed. My habits were changing as I knew my routine was about to be disrupted. Filling a blank isn’t always easy.
The challenges of living back on track “the good life”, still has negative impacts. After completing parole, I now had a felony charge on my background and record. Career moves and education would be tested. Blessed with a hard work ethic, my felony never gave any problems. In time I had my felony expunged. That wss inner peace of my self. I furthered my education with a Bachelors of Science degree in Psychology in 2010. I was coming alive inside cause I knew how to. Overtime I Iearnt what it takes to overcome. Being defeated is temporary. I felt I wasn’t strong enough to fight, down to being defeated. Wrong was I? I built an empire that I never knew was possible. So much can be done. No that anything is possible with one tool.. The master to life is 🗝️ to the mind, and that’s time. Educating the Mind. Your mind is power. You have the world of endless dreams when you open your mind. Educating the mind to life is a promise to overcome challenges. The best defense is knowing you have the option to learn. My life is far from perfect, knowing life makes sense is what matters. Struggles are life’s tools that give us strength. Love is an opportunity to prove your worth of being human. Love is told to be a beautiful thing. Love is the most painful experience that one must face. Truth be known Death is the love to eternal life. We must feel the worst level of extreme pain. That pain of life is the sacrifice to death. Afterlife of no pain, no sorrow just pure happiness of a world created by our God. My God has shown me life that exist beyond realm. As I have felt and visioned the life through my own eyes.
Life is precious to our eternal days. We will face the good Lord with treasures of our character. If those treasures are damaged at fault of yours, overcoming might be challenging.. Life of misery and hell will be provided, as you create your destiny. Time here on earth is measured by blessing to help one another, and valued human life as you perceive it. Hurting others and offering negative energy maybe your choice to void eternal life that’s promised. Until that judgement day is face to face with death. May you be the best product to life. A product everyone is proud to know and be a part of. If those words bite or sting- you have power of the mind to educate your options to overcome actions and behaviors. You are stronger than you think. As the mind never fails if you apply the time and work. Defeat is not an option to eternal life. Challenges may be mountains but mountains can be climbed. Lace up those boots and motivate the knowledge to be your best self. Life is best when dealt with by learning to overcome with a powerful tool – the mind.
Thank you for your time and for visiting ✔️Mental Mess, Life, and God. 👣 – My Story My Version – 👣
Not everything has an immediate solution. But knowledge can help you through it. Patience and time will guide you if your willing to put in the work.
If you want to stop using, there are a few things you can do:
First, figure out what caused you to start using in the first place. Was it a traumatic experience? Was there someone who told you that using drugs or alcohol was acceptable? Was it peer pressure? Childhood environment? Life has so many hidden stressors that we are blinded by. When we think, we aren’t strong enough? Think about a plan of action to overcome. Keep the plan fresh in mind. Support yourself with enjoyable positivity. Once positivity begins to flow, it becomes a regular flow.
Once you’ve figured this out, make sure that whatever caused your addiction no longer exists for you. If someone tells you that drugs or alcohol will make your life better, try not to believe them. They may have been lead by peer pressure and may have had some sort of experience with drugs or alcohol themselves—but they’re not responsible for your decisions and can’t expect you to make the same choices they did.
The next step is figuring out how much time and money are going towards solving these problems and how many hours of sleep are being lost because of them. Identifying these things will help keep track of solving the problem. Addiction is easy.. Overcoming is a challenge but your mind is powerful to help you through. Don’t give up.. Get up and face to challenge. In time you will gain so much positivity, ambition will guide you with a peace of mind.
Love to hear your experience and rewards of overcoming challenges you experienced. Shared stories can be the best therapy for another who is challenged with life of addiction or events. Feel free to share your experience.
Until our beautiful minds meet again. Be safe out there. Many blessings and much love. Remember Everyday Minds Matter – Della 💞🦋
Everyday Minds Matter was envisioned from thoughts or brain storming written regularly. Those writings from a seven year old. The brown hair, brown eyed girl, designed a dream; written with crayon and marker – Everyday Minds Matter. The final dream; folded up, sealed with a heart, that shined in pink nail polish. Protected within a jewelry box that latched without a lock. Security was tight, upon opening the box; music played as the ballorina circled in dance formation. Everyday Mind’s Matter protected in deep secret held for 34 years. A secret only known by the designer, treasured for many years.
A treasured dream to helping others overcome mental challenges and obstacles faced daily. Offering resources, techniques, and personal connections that support each individual needs.
Everyday Minds Matter goal is to welcome everyone regardless of your challenges. As our own challenges differ not every one shares the same results. What helped me work towards a happy space isn’t always best for another. It’s okay to not be okay. Sometimes trial and error is experienced before the proper treatment is found.
Sharing your personal story, life events, and experience can be anothers blessing. To recognize positive and negative influencers can influence proper changes to avoid triggers. Educate and the practice of mind exercises can improve mental health habits.
5 Key Benefits of Everyday Mind’s Matter
1-*• Importance of Childhood Mental Development
Childhood mental health development are fundamental values that influence character and behavior, into adulthood. Just as we have always been told, “what you do today, determines your tomorrow”. Mental health has the same rules. All the environmental influences positive or negative, create behavioral response. The main areas are physical (motor), language, communication, cognitive, and social/emotional. The action that creates response can only be learnt overtime. To improve mental health; practice mind exercises applied to daily routine, like reading, writing, or audio, interaction boost cognitive development. Without fostering important skills at an early age, a child could show signs of mental health issues.
2-*• Mental Health Stages
Mental health stages are presented in stages. Acknowledge the symptoms of mental health concerns present. Being aware of a condition that’s causing issues is important. (examples: confusion, stumbling, behavioral changes, reaction delays, functioning abilities, social skills). Yes, we all ignore these normal signs. Listen to the body, mostly pay attention to sudden changes. Mental or physical delays to function and disrupt daily routines can appear quickly. In some cases, health concerns gradually build, and the issues become emergencies. These signs or early symptoms need attention of professional examination for developmental diagnosis.
3-*• Strategies Customized for You
Mental or physical evaluation determines a diagnosis for addressing the concerned issue. Understanding the mental health issue will help the recovery process. Following your Healthcare providers instructions to treatment is important. Healthcare providers such as therapist, psychologist, neurologist, counselors, customize a treatment plan to your needs.
4-*• Mind My Business
Maintaining Mind My Business means be committed to improving mental health issues. Be determined to utilize all professional care as needed. Mental health is priority to well-being, which an effect physical health create more issues. Ask questions, use resources, practice developmental skills for your diagnosis. Mind My Business is making your own mental health, healthy once again. Your Mind is important business. Be committed to the importance of healthy mental health practices.
5-*• Acknowledge, Educate, & Mindfulness
It’s not easy to accept mental health issues or concerns, when they develop. Acknowledging the effects and causes can help future prevention. Educate yourself with abilities to improve and treat the diagnosis. Understanding that assistance and resources are available. No concern or question is foolish, don’t feel ashamed to ask questions. Your mental health is the foundation to a healthy happy you. Find others who share the same experience. Sharing your story could change someone else’s life. Expressing abilities to function in everyday challenges are elements for improving well-being.
Final thoughts to acknowledge development issues can help one to take action. Early childhood mental health issues can be clearly obvious. ( anxiety, depression, motor or speech illness, more in-depth mental conditions). Mental disorders or mental illness effect thinking, behavior, mood, emotional, or combined conditions determine the disorder or illness. Mental health and physical health work together to support well being. If one is effected the other can begin to deteriorate soon, as well.
Until our minds meet again. Be safe out there, much love and blessings. Remember, Everyday Mind’s Matter🦋 – Della 🦋
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