Tag Archives: Children

Stuck in the Middle: Growing up in Separate Homes

Talk about feelings and emotions
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As parents we are protectors, teachers, providers, and offer love for our children. In such a struggling economy, money is tight and stress levels are high. Leaving relationships in a stage of a breaking point. Sadly children are suffering from the fighting, the speration, and left in the middle of living between two homes. It’s difficult for children to understand the mixed emotions when parents separate or divorce. If you might be experiencing a co-parenting situation read into this. So let’s look into the co-parenting roles and the impact on our children.

Growing up in two houses can be both a blessing and a curse. Mixed emotions can be felt, blessed to have the best of both worlds—a warm, comforting environment at my mom’s and the same from my dad’s. Asgets older, they might begin to see the down sides of the situation—the yelling and constant bickering that parents seemed to do no matter where the child was. It can so hard to go to school feeling depressed, exhausted, and anxious. Some children experience so many emotions swirling inside them—anger, sadness, confusion, and a deep sense of being lost. Some are often too scared to ask parents what was wrong or why they were so angry. Again in most cases resort to just assumed it was because of them. But it doesn’t have to be this way.

We need to break the cycle of bickering and emotional outbursts. We need to create an environment of understanding, communication, and empathy. We need to start talking to our kids about how we feel and how our feelings affect their lives. We need to let them know that it’s okay to talk about their emotions and ask for help. We need to give our kids a safe space to be who they are and make mistakes. It can be tough growing up in two households, but it can also be an amazing learning experience. If we’re able to foster communication, understanding, and empathy, then it can be a place of growth, discovery, and resilience.

As adults, it’s our job to give kids the tools to succeed, help them grow into strong, confident adults, and develop strong mental and physical health. Unfortunately, a child growing up in a divorced household can suffer a variety of negative effects if the parents don’t come together and act in their child’s best interest. Yelling is one of the worst things you can do when co-parenting. A child who’s already dealing with the pain and confusion of two separate homes can become emotionally vulnerable when exposed to aggressive behavior.

Lacking the proper resources or understanding can impact a child’s life long-term. Triggers that impair motor and cognitive skills, that impacts the quality of education. It can take a short time of time or multiple occurrences to effect a child. This time frame varies depending on the severity of each situation.

Sometimes we don’t realize the amount of stress we carry until an situation takes place. Leaving us with poor judgement and behavior to simple matters. Apologizing only goes so far, proper adjustments can improve the results. Be patient, be kind, be ready to understand and communicate. The emotional effects of constant yelling at a child is heartbreaking itself. Just think about the long-term reality of routine yelling at a child. Actions speak louder than words, take control of your behavior. Intelligence goes a long way when implementing your own behavior.

Teach your child to be calm during disagreements. It’s in your abilities to teach guidance and understanding. Why not start where the problem starts?

Until our beautiful minds meet again, be safe out there. Many blessings and much love. Remember Everyday Minds Matter -Della 💞🦋

  • **** Withholding love is another form of neglect and something that can do tremendous damage to a child. Regardless of their situation, kids need the assurance that their parents are still there for them, and a cold shoulder will leave them feeling hurt, unwanted, and unsure of their own value. *”*** Being harsh or rigid in discipline is a poor parenting decision for anyone, but for children who are already under emotional distress it can lead to feelings of shame, confusion, and a belief that their behavior will never be accepted by their parents. By understanding the lasting impacts that come from any form of negligent or hostile parenting, we can strive to make sure our children are equipped with the knowledge, resources, and love that they need to stay healthy and strong through a very trying time in their lives.
  • * Yelling not only does long-term psychological damage to the child, but can increase levels of anxiety and anger, causing them to act out in inappropriate ways.
  • ** Neglect and absenteeism from either parent can be devastating for the child. Not being available for comfort or care during times of crisis and struggle can cause emotional, psychological, and physical damage to the child, as well as create trust issues in future relationships.
  • *** A lack of communication can also have negative consequences for children of divorced parents. Not having access to an adult to ask questions, explain thoughts, and confide in can leave a child feeling alone, anxious, and even guilty if there are disputes between the parents.

Just A Story to Tell

“Just a story to tell”

Photo by Karolina Grabowska on Pexels.com

The world was spinning, day in and day out, with endless tasks and endless responsibilities. Everything seemed so meaningless, so fleeting. In a society plagued with economic decline and suffocating debt, where nothing was as it should be, life was a challenge. Everywhere you looked, there was pressure and expectation. Jobs that didn’t provide enough, costs that kept growing and time slipping away, creating a constant, stressful atmosphere. People had to adapt, learn new skills and try to create something of their own to make it through. I was one of those people. Feeling weighed down by all that life was throwing at me, I searched for something meaningful and stable.

I decided to go back to something that had been in my heart since I was a child: writing. I decided to focus on writing/ storytelling. My goal was to express stories of joy and hope, as well as sorrow and fear. By using my words to transport people to a different world, even if just for a moment, I wanted to remind them that there was always a chance for a better tomorrow. My writing was far from perfect, but with practice I was slowly becoming a better writer/storyteller. Soon, I was creating content for and reaching an ever-widening audience. The monetary rewards are unavailable, was always great, but the greater reward was the joy and contentment of doing something that I truly loved. Today, I am still a storyteller, creating stories that bring joy, laughter and knowledge to people in a world filled with fear and doubt. As my words reach more and more people, I know that I am making a difference in their lives and giving them hope in a chaotic and troubled world.

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Once upon a time, in a small playground nestled in a rural corner of the world, the life of the children who used to gather there was far different than it is today. Long ago, there was little thought of economic or financial woes, or of where their future may lie. The days were filled with carefree play and youthful laughter as children tested their physical and mental boundaries on the equipment, finding solace in being able to freely express themselves in a safe, happy environment. But, with the onset of a global financial crisis and growing levels of inflation, the playground and its children have had to make a significant adjustment in the way they approach life. Where once the days were spent creating forts and towers, playing hide and seek and games of tag, the kids must now spend their free time gathering and growing their own food, scavenging for materials to barter, and devising strategies to make a living from their available resources. Gone are the days of simplistic enjoyment of one another’s company. For many of the kids at the playground, a job is the only viable way of providing for themselves and their families. There is little room for failure in the face of increasing hardship and mounting debt.

But amongst the change and upheaval of their current life, the playground kids have still managed to find time for self-expression. The vibrant colors of the play structures have been painted with poetry and images of hope, while some have taken up the art of story telling to capture their collective experience of the ever-evolving world around them. In a world where nothing is certain, one thing remains the same: the kids of the playground still keep hold of the powerful spirit of camaraderie and ingenuity, which ensures that even when the landscape of their life has changed, their stories of survival still remain.


Until our beautiful minds meet again be safe out there. Many blessings and much love.. Remember Everyday Minds Matter -Della 💞🦋

The Art of Gathering

Times and Gathering

Oh, how the times of gatherings have lost the shine. Interactions and communication are fundamental values to our well-being. The laughter, tears, sorrows, and happiness that others give us in this lifetime. Simple moments that fill our lives with a sense of purpose. Those moments that take place when we gather. During holidays, birthdays, important milestones in our lives. Why gatherings are important and why gatherings help maintain mental health. If you’re wondering where people are gathered today – well the importance of the “Art of Gatherings” is for you.

* Gatherings I can remember as a child family gatherings included large groups of people. Family that included long friends of the family and many more. Gatherings of lots of drinking, grilling out, kids running in the yard, playing horseshoes, volleyball, badminton, belly hurting laughter, and just good times. Those memories create my foundation to my own character. We learn from our childhood how we treat and respect others. The Art of Gatherings are important elements that give opportunity for memories. As a child I had uncles, aunts, grandparents, cousins, nephews, nieces that I grew up with. Those are family members that help shape who I am and have become.

* Time Changes with Age Time changes those gatherings overtime. The gatherings get smaller as loved ones age and leave this earth. We don’t notice until those gatherings are memories of those that once attended aren’t there. An empty chair at the dinner table. Those faces are with their children and grandchildren. Or maybe they have passed on. Our group has branched off to subdivide into other group gatherings. It’s not personal or your fault, life is what happened. Do they get busy with life and fail to attend gatherings? Or do they have larger functions and gatherings elsewhere? Do people still gather? Has the loss of loved ones put a toll on your Art of Gatherings?


* Picture of Who? The old black and dark colored photos in old albums your parents or grandparents kept. Albums that pictures are falling out of. Old albums that have such high value. One thing we can’t ever replace -photos. If found please keep and protect. Who has photo albums in 2022? Who has a physical camera that takes photos? Has gatherings changed the way we create photo albums? Photo albums are antique, physical pictures are precious diamonds. Who looks at old faded books or albums of photos, these days? Honestly, I do. Those photos are one of two things that live on after we expire. Photos are forever if properly stored and valued. (The other thing that continues after we expire is your signature).

Photo albums for 2022 are cell phones. Everyone has one and those photos should be available to show off daily. But do you glance at those photos after they are saved to your phone? Friends those phones will not hold the value to a photo album. Most of us can say, dang I had 1200 photos on my old phone. Impressive, right? Then the phone broke and those photos are gone. There is no replacement for those moments. That image is stored in memory of our mind. Sadly, we can describe a perfect moment, but our minds can’t print that picture in time.

The Art of Gatherings have a purpose for memories and photos. Take time to use a camera and create a family photo album. An album you created today, is worth a million words to those who inherit the photo album. Do yourself a favor if anything else. Take time to teach your children, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, neighboring children – The Art of Gatherings. Educate our future generation the value of appreciation of gatherings memories, and photo albums. The creation of a scrapbook or a family photo album teaches the value and appreciation to life. Mentally, emotionally, and physically form an attachment to memories and gatherings. The lost art of love can be reborn. Love is created by us who spread the word. Don’t continue to let technology form our future children’s beliefs. Gatherings is in person with photos to place in a photo album. Not the space and time spent on the web/internet that fills illusions of life.

In the final thoughts, The Art of Gatherings, help us deal with challenges. Challenges offer the opportunity to be “live in person”. Where feelings are felt, the good, bad, ugly raw emotions that create us. Feelings that teach us sadness, respect, happiness, love, anger, pain, and the value of an Art of Gatherings. Today is an opportunity to teach a lost value, that can live on longer after you expire. Are you teaching today? Tomorrow? Or sometime soon? I know you have amazing teaching skills. You lived life in the Art of Gatherings. You are a piece of Art that is forever through photos and your signature. Share your teaching skills, everyone’s teachable.

Until our beautiful minds meet again, be safe out there. Many blessings and much love. Remember Everyday Minds Matter -Della 💞🦋

Children’s needs depend on you – Be Responsive

Your Children Need You
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Everyday we all know, our list of things to do, continue to grow. As your children grow they look at you, full attention is on you. How you respond, attend, and show up is a priority to developmental growth. All eyes on you is a fact to life. Children want to grow and develop to be strong adults in life. It’s important how the parent relays facts to life. Be present, show up, and listen. Children crave you, your attention, your affection, and your time.

It’s important to be responsive

It is important to be responsive to your child’s needs. This means meeting their needs promptly and consistently. When you respond quickly and appropriately to your child’s needs, they learn that they can rely on you. Trust and honesty are what a child needs to feel safe and secure. This teaches children to be honest and good adults in life.

The importance of consistency

It is important to be consistent in your parenting. This means establishing routines and sticking to them. Children feel secure when they know what to expect from their parents. Consistency allows children to feel connected to their parents. A child can grow and develop emotions and mental health in a positive direction. Children need consistency to promote healthy mental health.

Hold and cuddle your child often

One of the best ways to create a secure attachment with your child is to hold and cuddle them often. This physical affection helps your child feel loved and secure, and can go a long way in establishing a strong bond between you and your child. Try to make a point of cuddling with your child every day, even if it’s just for a few minutes at bedtime or during morning snuggles. Like the ole’ saying goes, “Hugs go along way, even when they aren’t near”.

Respond promptly to your child’s needs

Another important tip for creating a secure attachment is to respond promptly to your child’s needs. This doesn’t mean you need to drop everything every time your child cries or call off work whenever they’re sick – but it does mean being attentive and responsive when they really need you. If possible, try to have at least one parent or caregiver available who can respond quickly to any major needs or issues that arise. Being attentive helps your child develop positive emotional connections. Connecting with others is an excellent ability to establish.

Establish routines and stick to them

Finally, another helpful tip for creating a secure attachment is to establish routines and stick to them as much as possible. Having consistent routines gives children a sense of security and predictability, which can help reduce anxiety and promote feelings of safety and well-being. Try to maintain regular mealtimes, bedtimes, bath times, etc., as much as possible, and let your child know what to expect ahead of time so they can feel prepared and comfortable. Routine can help a child feel responsible and safe. It’s okay to give your child a schedule to adhere to.

A secure attachment between parent and child is vital for the healthy development of the child. Attachment provides children with a sense of safety and security, which is essential for their emotional well-being. There are many ways to create a secure attachment with your child, but some of the most important include bonding, responsiveness, and consistency. By following these tips, you can give your child the foundation they need to thrive.

Until our beautiful minds meet again, be safe out there. Many blessings and much love. Remember Everyday Minds Matter -Della 💞🦋

“Please Don’t Yell, I’m Right Here”. – How Yelling impacts your Mental Health

"STOP" Yelling - it's harmful to both parties involved

We all know that one person or maybe your own self, who adds “yelling” to their daily routine. Is yelling really, necessary? In this blog post, we learn the science of yelling, and understand effects on one’s mental health. Yelling may seem like a harmless thing to do, but there are actually many different reasons behind why people tend to do it, as well as many unexpected effects that yelling can have on our lives and relationships. If you yell regularly, this may be something that you have done without realizing the negative impact it has had on you and those around you, so read on to find out more about the reasons why people tend to yell and how yelling effects those around them in their daily life and relationships.

* The Science of Why We Yell
Yelling has serious consequences for both the person doing the yelling and the person being yelled at. It can lead to mental health problems including anxiety, depression, and PTSD. Yelling is a sign of verbal abuse that should not be taken lightly. With these consequences in mind, it’s important to consider whether or not yelling is worth it. We might feel better momentarily but after time, those who are subjected to our anger will find themselves angry with us. We must remember that people who yell are often their own worst enemy because they end up hurting themselves more than they hurt others. When we stop caring about how we make others feel, what happens next? For many people, their mental health may start to decline. They may experience frequent headaches, poor sleeping patterns, and even an increased risk of suicide. If you want to live your best life while helping others do the same, then please don’t yell!

* How Yelling Affects the Brain
Yelling at someone can cause a range of negative emotions for both the person who’s yelling and the person who is being yelled at. It may be satisfying to yell, but it won’t make you feel good afterward. Plus, repeated yelling can have some serious effects on your brain. For example, one study found that people who were yelled at showed more activity in the part of the brain responsible for fear and panic than those who weren’t. So if you’re constantly yelling at your kids, they’re going to live in constant fear and anxiety! In addition, when we are yelled at, we show increased activity in our amygdala (the fight-or-flight response), which causes stress responses like an increased heart rate or high blood pressure. Yelling also increases inflammation levels. All this means that not only does anger hurt the people around us when we yell, but it also hurts us! We need to figure out ways to communicate with each other without using aggression. when we yell, it affects how well our voice will work afterwards. Yelling at high volumes causes tiny ruptures in the vocal chords that may not be noticeable right away but they can lead to soreness or even shortness of breath later on. In addition, yelling lowers the levels of oxygen in your blood which could lead to other health complications like decreased immunity. Remember: I’m right here, please don’t yell!

  • * Yelling doesn’t work Yelling only escalates the situation and frustrates both people involved. If yelling does happen, it’s important to apologize for being out of control – no matter how difficult it is. The next time you feel yourself getting too heated, pause for just a moment. Take a couple deep breathes and relax your mood and tone of voice. Think about the situation and is it worth the effort to yell?

Yelling seems to be a momentarily relief for some. But yelling has long term health effects, that are often ignored. Not only do you hurt the one who is being yelled at, you’re hurting yourself as well. So before you get heated, take a couple deep breathes. Change your tone of voice, walk away, and calm down. So next time you start to raise your voice, breathe in and stop. Is yelling worth hurting another person? Think about it, yelling impacts lives today, tomorrow, and permanently. Are you okay with impacting your children, family, or friends because yelling is part of your routine? “Please Don’t Yell, I am right here”.

Until our beautiful minds meet again, be safe out there. Many blessings and much love. Remember Everyday Minds Matter -Della 💞🦋

😷 Covid-19 Still Strong 😷

A New World

We live in a world much more interconnected than it was a century ago. This interconnectedness means that decisions like COVID-19 can have cascading effects across the international system. They can also magnify pre-existing domestic and international forces. In this post, we will take a look at the impact of COVID-19 and the implications for the world economy.

Impact on children

Children who have been exposed to COVID-19 have been affected in different ways. Some were hospitalized because of the virus, while others did not. Children who live in multigenerational housing or in low-income households were most affected. In addition, children who work in occupations involving high contact with other people are at higher risk of getting this illness.

The impacts of COVID-19 on children are widespread and long-lasting. This virus is affecting food systems, livelihoods, and access to health services. In some countries, it is affecting the quality of schooling for girls. In other countries, it is affecting access to life-saving services such as vaccines.

COVID-19 has affected 23 countries and nearly 405 million schoolchildren. These children are at risk of dropping out of school, preventing them from completing their education. While the direct mortality effects of COVID-19 on children are still relatively low, the indirect effects are devastating.

Impact on labor markets

COVID-19 has had a massive and rapid impact on the U.S. economy and labor markets. While this shock was largely understated in the short-term, the full impact will become apparent in the second half of 2020. The study describes the impact of COVID-19 on payroll jobs and job disruptions, including the disparities based on sex and race. The research indicates that the pace of job recovery has slowed since June.

Before COVID-19, the global economy was relatively stable. The immediate impact was similar across countries, with workers in the leisure, travel, and hospitality industries being impacted the most. However, most countries were quick to implement emergency measures that mitigated the immediate impact. In developed countries, government spending increased to support incomes, whereas in developing countries, the government had less room to increase spending.

As a result of the COVID-19 pandemic, global labor markets were disrupted and millions of people lost their jobs. Many workers were furloughed or shifted to working from home. However, many essential workers continued to work in grocery stores, warehouses, garbage trucks, and hospitals. During these transitional times, these workers had to adapt to new working conditions, including new protocols aimed at reducing the spread of the novel coronavirus.

Impact on fragile states

The COVID-19 pandemic has created significant anxiety and suffering across the world. This situation has forced governments to re-orient their resources and focus on preventing the spread of the disease. Though concerns about effective development may seem far off, they are still pertinent, especially in fragile states. Effective crisis management requires a commitment to resilient national systems, open lines of communication, and shared responsibility.

It is imperative that fragile states continue to strengthen their governance and resilience. The international community has an obligation to hold these governments accountable and continue to support them to achieve sustainable development and resilience. The global community must also support conservation practitioners working to conserve ecosystems. The transition from fragile state to sustainable development requires enormous resources, energy, and commitment. Unfortunately, some countries lack the resources needed to meet these challenges. However, this crisis has demonstrated the power of the global community and the importance of the issue.

The COVID-19 pandemic has created a global emergency, and it threatens fragile states, especially those with weak health systems. It could rob them of their ability to meet their basic needs. This could lead to economic collapse, job losses, and disruptions in food and commodity supply chains.

Until our beautiful minds meet again, be safe out there. Many blessings and much love. Remember Everyday Minds Matter-Della 🦋💞