πŸ‘οΈ My Story My Version – πŸ’« Finding My Way – Caregiver

Where we land – a Foundation Forms

Oh! What a beautiful world we live in. The creation of humans, an honest act of intimate sexual behavior. The need to look around, isn’t necessary. The sexual act to reproduce is going strong. πŸ˜‹ Though have you ever just got stumped and wondered- what if lives came with instructions, a blue print to our lives? The mystery to living would be pretty simple, boring, and overall faulty. Yes, I said faulty.😊 Nothing would be realistic to operate and function. Guidelines responsible for behavior, intelligence, growth, appearance would be the same. An most importantly, different is what makes the beautiful characters we have designed ourselves. The moment one takes that first breathe of life, everyday moment matters. By experience, environment, and one’s developmental growth, character begins to form one’s inner core – the foundation. Mental and physical health are priority to ones foundation that give us insight into adulthood.

Our instruction are clear as children that are unconsciously presented young. The core foundation had developed before our actual future was present.

A business – foundation who we are, what one becomes, The core purpose to life. We sell ourselves to the world everyday: the product. -“You”. Once you look back the whole process can be impressive. My foundation My Story My Version – Finding My Way.

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Finding My Way – Caregiver

My business became natural to my routine as a young girl. My neighbors were an older couple, Clyde and Evaline. An older model trailer renovated on my parents property. If they were here to tell the story, they enjoyed my company. Or I would of assumed for the most part.. I can only remember it being late 80’s. It was daily my brother and I would visit Clyde. As he would sit out back with Shep his Collie dog and piddle in his shed. Many things he taught us, or talked about his life. Kids being kids we would eat the cherry tomatoes from his garden. I would go in and talk with Evaline or help her do little chores. A quick friendship formed being that close to them on a regular basis.

One day my brother and I were outside playing, when we heard a loud explosion. Running to see what happend, the shed was on fire. Clyde’s pants were burnt off and he was standing by the shed.. I ran back home and got my uncle. Evaline called the fire department, as my uncle was trying to put out the fire. Clyde was disoriented, the pain on his face was heart felt. Evaline was scared with the shed built next to their mobile home trailer. Clyde explained the cause of the fire. Working on repairing a lawn mower, Clyde was trying to see if the spark plug had fire. A spark hit a gas can nearby causing the explosion. Once fire department arrived my uncle had smothered out most the fire. Clyde was livid as burns on his legs were 3rd degree, refusing to go for treatment. But after long negotiation, he was taken to the hospital. It seemed as he was away a long time for treatment. Once returning home, I would visit helping Evaline to treat the wounds. As a child it was such sight to see the burnt skin. The higher degree burn areas were freshly open wounds. Skin drafts from other areas of the body to aide healing. Wrapping and cleaning the burn wounds was a natural for me. I took pride in my ability to help Clyde in his recovery.

Unconscious act as a child, my learning and willingness – a core foundation – to being a natural born caregiver. Clyde had started to recover quickly, his ambition to get back in the shed was intense. Even with the wounds healing the process took quite sometime.. Evaline had days she seemed very unhappy. The relationship had some arguing regularly and ups and downs.

One day after school, I knocked on the door. Clyde said Evaline had fell hanging curtains. He said when she got home he would call and I could visit. A few days later a van showed up. Delivering a hospital bed, that was put in the living room. I knew Evaline was coming home soon I was very excited. Waiting for her to arrive, that day sitting on the porch. She gave me a hug and I had to know everything, for her best recovery.. That mid-day her daughter told me she fell broke her hip. Evaline did a lot of crying, her pain was very intense. Didn’t realize the medicine just never gave her much relief. She refused pain medicine at first, until. I told her it would help her as much as possible. To get up was impossible, so helping her on a bed pan wa normal but it surely put pain in her hip..

Caregiver become priority each day, after school. Positioning pillows, laundry, or help with other household chores, I was there. Helping her with therapy to mobilize WA fun and rewarding. Watching her take steps and being able to dress herself with little if my assistance. Just as her strength improved, she started using a walker, happiness covered my face.  Her recovery gave me joy since it took a lot of work.  Friendship had a special place deep in the heart. 

One afternoon after school; knocking on the door- no answer. The car was gone but she was always home. Something was different. Mom was outside as I walked down the driveway. Starting to cry, mom hugged me saying she will write or call. She went to live with her daughter in Indiana.  Her husband Clyde wasn’t home. They argued a lot so I didn’t understand that situation.

Unable to say good-bye, my heart broke, thinking my best friend didn’t say good-bye.  Days walking past the trailer, wondering if she thought of me. Being a young girl, I didn’t like the feeling of emotions, a smothering anxiety that just happens or just the sadness overall was uncomfortable. That day carried a weight–; good-bye’s hold so much emotion of love and friendship– bring tears to my eyes.  Clyde had moved away when I was in school, not long after Evaline moved.

Good-byes was hard to understand. We cry happy tears and painful tears connected to good-byes. Reunited visits with family or friends capture the heartfelt love of joy. And we all know the final days of life (death) good-bye’s, can’t be prepared for – create endless tears….

As a young girl, everything inside torn apart. Weak feeling, crying, and angry, wanting to be alone. What had happened? Kids aren’t suppose to be sad.  Every part of me, from the experience, hurt. Waiting for a letter or phone call from my friend. Mom and I had tried a few times, to contact her. The phone number she left– no answer.  Not a single letter in the mail.

To ease the pain, I wrote my friend many letters.  With no response, writing in a journal gave my heart relief. Over time, thinking about her well- being. In my world, I knew she lost my address and number, to me she lived forever somewhere.

A plan was created written in crayon, marker, sealed with stickers and pink nail polish. Written by a brown eyed, brown haired 7-year-old- just in case she forgot about me.

  Everyday Minds Matter – mental health and well-being set the path for everyone. Establish practice to focus, retention, and concentration; healthy habits to prevent obstacles in mental status.  Overcome mental health challenges faced that affect daily routine. 

Writing that filled notebooks, diaries, and scrap paper- focused on my future dream.

In little time, old man Clyde move away. To my surprise my mamaw- (fathers’ mom) moved in the trailer.Β  The void was filled. Not skipping a beat; my brother and I had mamaw to aggravate.Β  With no time to waste, enjoying my childhood– documented every step of the way.Β It was nice to spend time with mamaw. After all I was named after her and my mothers mom. – Della Louise – Mamaw was teaching me to crochet. I was about eight years old, so learning to make a baby blanket was exciting. She was teaching me how to fix mess ups, then one day after school. Knocking on the door as it was slightly open. Suddenly noticing it was very hot in there. Mamaw was in the kitchen, every burner – red hot. Nothing on the burners, which was freighting. Calling mom and dad I told them what was happening. Dad said my aunt and uncle from Florida were coming to visit. Mamaw wanted to cook for them, something wasn’t right . All four stovetop burners on high, potato peelings on the floor, and so hot in there. Dad came up told mamaw that she needed to go o the doctor. That evening my other aunt came to stay the night to help take care of mamaw, since my mom had pneumonia. Doctor visit that day indicated mamaw had several mini strokes. Then she had a stroke on the right side. Which effected the opposite side of the body and motor skills. I still remember she didnt have much or little feeling on her left side. At times she would smile, as her mouth and eye was effected. I was able to help her as much as possible. That night my aunt slept in th room with mamaw as it shared two beds. I slept on the couch an was woken by my dad on the phone talking.

It was about 2 am in the morning, my dad was standing in the doorway were my mamaw slept. I stood beside the dresser, when I seen my aunt seating on the bed with mamaws head on her lap. As she rubbed mamaws head talking to her. Dad told me to stay back, mamaw said let her here. Standing next to her and my aunt. My aunt put my hand with hers. Mamaw said ” no matter what I will always be with you, you carry my name”. She said “I love you.” My aunt was talking to her and when I walked away. She took her last breathe and passed. My dad had called mamaws sisters in Ohio to let her know of mamaw passing. Mary one the sisters answered the phone saying Georgia the other sister had been up but didnt feel well and went back to sleep. They would tell her after while since she hadn’t felt well. Mamaw passed about 3 am. Aunt Mary called back about 5 am – deciding to wake Georgia to let her know of mamaw passing. Only to discover Georgia had died in her sleep. Same day, a couple hours apart and not knowing of each others death.

As the world then had a reason for two sisters to pass the same day. With a higher power to have such occurrence for such to take place. From that day forward life had calling to care and love for those around you. Naturally as I grew older I had cared for others and watched as loved one passed. A moment that set life apart is that life is so precious. Having the blessing to be there every step of the hell of one’s final days. The good, the bad, and pain of loss and endless tears. Those moments are raw footage to living and experiencing life. Experience that root into our core to create the beautiful person we become. And with the finding my way as a caregiver. I can say by experience the days might be challenging. That’s okay! Because when life plays its role and those final days have come and gone. One thing I know for sure, the inner peace to love and grief hurt. But that hurt is a special blessing. That says im content with the experience. As it helps us grow and learn to accept death and the ability to grieve and be okay.. I hope that doesn’t sound bad. I guess once you have that understand through experience. One day it might give hope to those that are grieving. However, I will write on grieving and loss of loved ones in time.

Until our beautiful minds meet again. Be safe out there. Many blessings and much love. Remember Everyday Minds Matter – Della πŸ¦‹

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The next My Story My Version soon to be coming.. May of 1987, celebrating my cousins first birthday. One step in the street- – Touched by An Angel. .stay toned for updates to come soon.

Until our minds meet again.. Be safe out there and remember Everyday Minds Matter – DellaπŸ¦‹

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