As normal, the day seemed to be going well. Happiness was part of waking up, and the day was full of productive events. Later, throughout the day plans are on schedule as planned.
Somewhere in our moment of happiness – unexpectedly, our day turns shifting to leave us feeling some different kind of way. While feeling some kind of joy and cheerfulness, the change kicks in. Possible breakup with a partner, a flat tire, unexpected expense, a sudden death, a co-parenting conflict involving a child, job loss, a domestic violence matter, or just a sickness, the list goes on and on. An event that leaves us feeling uncomfortable. That situation, consciously or unconsciously affects the next minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, and possibly years to come.,
Unfortunately, no one ever wants to feel the pain that comes with the mental challenges we are dealt with..
At times, it just seems unfair, wondering what we might have done to have such pain thrown at us.. Why me? One might ask. Why must this happen to me? What have I done to deserve this? Questions we all often ask ourselves, and never do we get an answer… Answers always are comforting; it’s not your fault, smoothing out the pain, to help each other through the situation. Even with our best supporter, words are just words.. Most times we barely hear what is being said. At the moment, we feel as being paralyzed, numb, speechless, and blank-minded.
The mind and body stop, almost like the blood supply just froze – in time. In that moment nothing could feel, see, touch, or hear, in the presence of life.. Everything besides actual death, seems to have taken place within the mind and body. A shutdown without notice, just unfunctionable to exist. Our so-called life just crumbled, pain stricken to feel non-existent.
To gather thoughts or get up and move seems impossible. How does this happen to our body and mind all at once? There is no answer; there is no logical explanation.. Yes, the struggle becomes reality. Our reality… Our moment of reality, to face. What shall I do next? The truth is there a million dollar question we all ask? How do I fix this? Can I do this alone? Our soul screams on the inside, begging for help. We are silent. Why are we afraid to ask for help? Just one truth – we are human. Just being human, we are tossed into hell, chewed up, slightly battered, bruised, rolled, tumbled, beaten, criticized, and told to suck it up, your fine – and to function. Function? I repeat “FUNCTION”. If thinking and moving is functioning, plus responsibilities are part of being able to function; Hell No!
Functioning can be devastating to those who experience life-changing events for the first time. My encounter with function is far from close during my life-changing events.
Life is the answer. Searching to find the solution to our challenges, obstacles, and pain – truth is called life. From our first breath and vision of light – straight out of the womb our fight to survive has begun. Babies are born with illness or never get an opportunity to see the light. I can relate to miscarriage in early pregnancy. This is horrible to even write. No amount of time can stop our minds from all the what-ifs, had I, wish I would have moments, but none of that changes anything. If people would see the reality; the struggle to survive, then the picture of life would be different.
Being a perception of that badass, fearless, invisible superhero does not excuse or eliminate you from pain. just because one claims the name badass. That stigma is a novelty written into your inability to chance or face life-altering events. It’s not a draw for tickets – to chance. It’s just life taking, it’s course. …
For those who feel exempt from life’s course of challenges, please step forward. Don’t tell the secret. Just give a hint on how to avoid challenges in life we face at times? Trust me, I have suited up in the best armor and strong intentions to face life. Every time I got knocked on my ass, weak and non-existing in the world. Took the beaten path over and over again. Life does not stop for anyone or anything, not even lend a hand at times.
So in regards to being a badass, what eliminates pain? Substance abuse, alcohol, medication, illegal drugs, any form of numbing effect. Take me out of this world – doesn’t that reason with why addiction exists? My friends, we are only human. Yes, I was and possibly will be the first one to push and shove to the front line of addiction. – when unknown trauma happens.
We are not taught how to deal with tragedy, fear, bullying, pain, death, illness, trauma, separation, divorce, debt, homelessness, personal attacks, etc. We are not experts at life until we expire and leave this earth. Simply because we are challenged face to face one-on-one with life or death. Surviving life is challenging.
This is the definition of a mental health crisis. You are not alone. I am right beside you, begging for mercy. I will admit at times, life sucks. Good days and bad days come and go . Unpredictable days never completely go away. They just become manageable (at times).
As a child, if we were able to sign up for life classes, I would have been there. That’s not an option, we are taught first hand unexpectedly. With limited rules, no skipping class on homelessness, debit, death, co-parenting, life-threatening illness, domestic violence, miscarriage, divorce, etc. Those courses are taught in real time settings.
Actually, these events teach us valuable lessons on how to be human. There is no right or wrong answer; different situations affect each of us differently. That’s perfectly okay and normal., One will deal with it regardless of whether you feel exempt or not from the situation. Overtime, those situations catch up to the ability to function, crippling emotions, feelings, and well-being, creating more health concerns in the future.
Our struggles are reality, if everyone in the world played Red Rover🤸🧚🤼🧍we would all be joined holding hands. There is not one individual living who has perfect mental health. If so where do I sign up for lessons on life?
Just something to think about today and everyday forward🎭 we wake up with questions or options each day:. Which mask shall I wear today? Do I feel like my normal self? Or shall I wear my mask to face the world?
Then tomorrow we do it all over again.. The bitter truth is, because no one wants to listen to sadness, other people’s problems, it’s depressing, right? Most conversations start by briefing what someone’s going through. The conversation changes in a short period of time why? Problems take hours and hours to fix and figure out. We are wrapped up in our right now, moment to even really care. We are an army of one, to face and deal with our own challenges. Am I wrong? Tips, ideas, and resources are available, but we listen to or read what we think we help us. It’s self help. Our instinct to look for reasonable answers without asking. Self-help is how we get through life. Learning what works best for our needs. Being your own supporter. Through trial and error we help ourselves push through challenges. Without the self-help feature, our ability to function becomes limited.
Until our beautiful minds meet again, be safe out there . Much love and blessings. Remember Everyday Minds Matter 💘 Della🦋